(Closed) PreNuptials…The Answer not The Question

posted 10 years ago in Beehive
Post # 3
Member
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2008

You need to consult an attorney.  It doesn’t work the same way everywhere and you need State specific information.

Post # 4
Member
45 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2008

This is a great topic and you’ve worded it very well!  I have never thought of doing a prenupt, and I don’t think I will either.  But, I must say, that the reasons you described are thoughtful and worth looking in to for anyone in a similar situation. 

When you’re broke like me and my love, I don’t think a prenupt matters much!!

Post # 5
Member
242 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2018 - Dreams Cancun Resort & Spa

There are also ways to structure your practice so creditors can’t reach into your personal assets as well.  I strongly recommend consulting an attorney in your area since you never know if what you draft will hold up in court.

Post # 6
Member
226 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Great article, but this isn’t the sole way to protect your assets, as lovebird pointed out.  I’m an engineer who’s duties require me to protect my assets.  I asked my lawyer a while back if a pre-nupt would be best to protect my FI when we marry, and he advised me against it as the law limits the protection a prenupt can give in my case.  To each their own, and obviously consult a lawyer as each states laws are different. 

Post # 7
Member
75 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2008

It sounds to me like your cousin therefore has no claim to the house if anything goes wrong?  I wouldn’t sign any prenup that said that.  Definitely talk with an attorney.  It’s maddening and expensive (I know: we’re doing it now), but the document will hold up better in all circumstances, good and bad.

Post # 8
Member
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2008

Hey now, I hope you mean the process, not the attorney, is "maddening"! And as for "expensive"– trust me, we work really long, late (or more properly said early), constant, no time to finish wedding planning (unless you use your vacation days and then you’re still on your Blackberry) hours!
 
🙂 

Post # 9
Member
192 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2008

We’re doing a pre-nup. Actually, truth be told it was my idea. Unlike the situations above, it doesn’t have anything to do with protecting us from others taking our financial stability away from us, we have a few different componets.

My fiance is in law enforcement. There happens to be a particular free website that will allow anyone to seach a name and come up with all kinds of  information about a person. It even goes so far as to list relatives names. (yea, we were shocked) to protect our family, while we’re in the process of puchasing a home, we’ve had to do some creative paperwork in putting his name on the property title differently to give us some extra added security.

Since the house is going to be listed in his "name" only, I will not be on the deed however, we’re paying 50/50 for it (downpayment and all). That’s where the pre-nup comes into play.

My mother thought I was being crazy in asking for one. I told her I would be crazy not to. I understand the "what’s mine is mine, and yours is yours" mentality, but this is a different situation, and should anything ever happen down the road (god forbid) I want to make sure that a home, I’ve been equally contributing to that does not have my name on the deed isn’t going to be "just his" and there will be some financial security in there for me also.

Like Donald Trump says… "Rich or poor, EVERYONE should have a pre-nup"  I agree with him to a point, maybe not everyone, but I believe in certain situations, yes.

 

Post # 10
Member
75 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2008

The process is maddening, and the attorneys (plural because of course you each must have one–hence also "expensive") are maddening only because they are part of the process :-).

Post # 11
Member
2 posts
Wannabee

It definitely doesn’t work that way in any state in the U.S. that I’m aware of.  You really need to consult an attorney in your own state that focuses on family law to figure out if a prenup would give you any sort of protection in the way you describe.  Structuring your business as an LLC could be a much safer, and likely easier, way to achieve the same result.

Post # 12
Member
337 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

For those of you who have very little in the way of savings or assets and therefore think that a prenup is not necessary, I just wanted to mention something that my dad told me a few weeks ago that I hadn’t thought of.  He said it’s not just about your current net worth but also your future net worth – if one of you might be coming into any sort of inheritance if a relative passes away, you might want to protect your future inheritances in a prenup.  Obviously if you stay together and one of you comes into an inheritance, you would share it, but if you were to split up, it would be a shame for your ex to take half of an inheritance that was intended to stay within your family.  Just something to consider.

Post # 13
Member
16 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 1969

again, you should consult your attorney because each state is different.  smartl, whether an inheritance/gift that you receive while you’re married stays as your property or becomes both of yours also depends on the state. 

Post # 14
Member
123 posts
Blushing bee

Does anybody know if you can include child custody in prenup ? I am a foreigner and my bf ( we do plan to get married in relatively near future) is American. All of my family and a lot of my friends are in Europe and therefore if things didn’t work out for us ( hopefully this won’t be the case, but with 50/50 chances, nobody knows), I would most likely move back to Europe to be closer to my family. I was told that I can’t move away (out of state or country)  with children without court approval etc. Did anybody hear about this ? Or about anybody whose pre-nup includes details about potential child custody ?

 I know this may sound crazy, but my Mom got divorced twice and I work with a lot of divorced bitter people so divorces, settlements and the such are part of daily conversation.

Post # 15
Member
179 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

Petunka – I think kids from a previous marriages is one of the main reasons to get a prenup – to cover how they will be dealt with.  I’m not sure from your post petunka that you have one or think you would have one.  I’d go and ask a lawyer the question it sounds like a reasonable prenup request.  Of course you’d have to get him to agree to giving up contact with a future kid so it depends on his reaction. 

The one idea I like the most about prenups is debt protection.  Even if the assets are equal if he hasn’t been honest about his liabilities then it would be nice if you  could not get tagged with them in a divorce, ruining a credit record in the process.  I know at least one divorce that hidden debt was a big part of – and was the most contentious part of the divorce.  Plus – people assume that they won’t need them -but if he’s lying about that what else is he hiding.

 Anyways I’m on the fence with a prenup – I think I’m covering the debt protection by sharing our credit scores and credit reports.  I have more assets – but not a lot.  I want one but am not sure I can justify the cost.

 

The topic ‘PreNuptials…The Answer not The Question’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors