(Closed) Problems with future SIL

posted 6 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
4194 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

Oh dear lord, what a little brat she is. What is she, 12? I’m sorry that I don’t have any advice, but I am supporting you that she is WAY out of line on this. She is not losing a brother, she is gaining a sister. You are correct, you don’t need her approval/feedback on anything you do- it’s YOUR day. She’s obviously jealous and very immature-hope she puts her big girl panties on and grows up! (I *hate* the family drama that comes with weddings-UGH!)

 

Post # 6
Member
395 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I can completely relate to this. My FSIL lives on her own little planet where the bank of Mom & Dad is in full swing. She’s extremely spoiled and very manipulative. She’s called FI crying saying that I’m ruining their family and I don’t include her Mom in wedding planning. However, I have another post on here outlining exactly why I don’t include her. Honestly, I’ve just given up playing into her nonsense. I don’t tolerate her whining, bitching, etc. and I call her out when she’s being a brat. She doesn’t like it, but I’m tired of being civil.

I’m sorry that you have to go through all of this. Wedding planning is supposed to be a happy time, but sometimes people have to ruin it. I wish you the best of luck! 🙂

Post # 7
Member
14 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@Monkey786:  OMG, this is your chance.  Right Now.  If she is declining the BM position, be happy about it and just let her be!!  Most brides are FORCED into having in-laws in the wedding party.  Now that it was HER doing to exclude herself, she can’t be mad that you’re taking her out of the bridal party.  If she’s acting like this now, imagine what you’ll be dealing with on the wedding day.  She will not be concerned with helping you with anything.  She’s going to make it about her and her brother (not how she’s gaining a sister).  She will take over the photographer and ask for more pictures with her and her brother (without you in them), she will ask the hair/makeup artist to spend more time on her, she will most likely give a toast about her brother and how close they are and how much she is going to miss him (and exclude any mention of you from the toast) . . . yuck!! Trust me, this is a blessing in disguise.  I know you’re frustrated with them right now, but just keep doing what you’re doing, and keep reminding yourself, that no matter what you do, SIL will not be happy.  she is a selfish person, and selfish people don’t change.  I’m dealing with two similar characters right now (SIL and MIL have serious issues and think that they are the most important women in DH’s life . . . really, they get offended when he bus me gifts, or takes me out to places without inviting them).

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