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Procrastinating BM - Result: pay rush for your dress!

posted 9 months ago in Bridesmaids
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    1.
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    Wannabee
    rapsap    October 7, 2011  

    I'm in a dilemma that makes me as a bride feel extremely guilty.  I am going to vent and maybe some of you bees will be sympathetic or will have words of wisdom how to gracefully deal with my situation.

    Four months ago I found the BM dress I wanted my girls to get.  I sent an email following up with them in June again, telling them where to order, what the timeline was like and they all ignored it!  My wedding is Oct. 7, 2011 and come to find out this week none of them had ordered their dress.  I feel like I am holding their hands and stressing about this and its the one thing I have asked them to do.  To begin with, the dress was $158 (After Six 6611 in espresso!) and they needed extra length which was an extra $20.  Ok, so they could deal...But now its a $40 rush!!  With shipping it came to $242 which is ludicrous in my opinion.  Should I feel guilty or should they pull up their big girl panties and let it ride on them for procrastinating so long?

    I have talked with my FH and he has said not to worry because its not my responsibility to baby them through the process as they knew what they were getting into a YEAR ago when I asked them to be in my wedding.  They should have saved and really read my emails.

    AHHHHHHHHHHHH!

     
    2.
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    Blushing bee
    Beansy    October 22, 2011  

    This is not your fault or your problem. What I would suggest is that you pretend you have no idea what the cost is, and if any of your 'Maids have the audacity to say something, look Truly Apologetic and say

    "Brittney, I'm sorry, $248 does seem like a rididuclous amount to pay for a dress, I had No Idea you planned to wait so long to buy your dress or I would have told you there would be rush charges"

     

    It is not your fault.

     
    3.
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    Sugar bee
    Mrs.ChubbyBunny    October 1, 2011   Texas

    Wow, are we the same person because it sounds like me writing this post? I feel your pain, I have been there, exactly in your situation pretty much. I have stepped away from the situation ultimately... They are grown women, they should be able to do this on their own. I refuse to be a babysitter. I too asked my girls a year ago and my emails, texts, and calls have gone ignored. Oh well. The girls who have dresses will stand, those do not will be guests. As the bride, you have enough to worry about, please don't make their concerns your own. I know it sucks to have an uneven number of BMs and GMs, however those without a partner can very easily walk on their own.

    Hang in there, it will get better I promise.

     
    4.
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    Helper bee
    Lady Baker    October 2014  

    What did they expect to happen?

    They should all know the basics of being bridemaids (or asked you for any help if they didn't know). It's kind of expected that if you have to order a specialty dress item it has to be ordered in advance...otherwise you won't be able to get it in time or you'll have to pay an extra fee. 

    You gave them plenty of time to order their dresses. They can get snippy all they want, but you did let them know months ago that they should order them.

     

     

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