Post # 1
I know this topic has been beat to death, but I was wondering for the women that use their maiden name in their professional setting and their husband’s name otherwise, did you have problems gaining licensure in your field with your maiden name? Even though that’s not what’s on your social security card?
I’m specifically thinking about the medical field, but I imagine it would apply anywhere else as well.
Do you ever get annoyed with keeping your name straight and wish you had just picked one or the other?
My last name is ethnic and since my father was an only son and he only had daughters, it’s ending with my sister and I. My boyfriend (let’s hope FI some day soon), has a very interesting last name and it doesn’t sound bad with my first name or anything, I would definitely consider taking it. But I just feel like I’m abandoning my culture and my dad who has given me so much love and support to do what I want to do. Keeping my last name would be a tribute to him/my mother and their part in my life. BUT, I would still like to have the last name as my husband and kids! Do all women have this much difficulty leaving behind their last names?!
Plus, since my bf is a little slow on the marrying-front, my maiden/current last name is probably what’s going to be on my degree. And I think it’s kind of weird to have that thing hanging in my office while I have people calling me Dr. Something else. They’re gonna be like “Who’s diploma is this? Where’s Dr. V’s diploma? Did she not graduate from a good school?”
Oh, and our hyphenated name sound RIDICULOUS. My friends make fun of me (jokingly) at school because it sounds so silly. So let’s not discuss that, there’s no way I can do it and take myself seriously as a professional. I’d snicker everytime I said my own name. And bf doesn’t want to merge names to make a new one. So I’m stuck with picking one or the other.
If you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading! I’ve been thinking about this forEVER and I just can’t seem to settle on a decision. 🙁
Post # 3
I dont think it would be as confusing as you think. When people see that you are married, they will understand why the last name on your degree is different. I dont think that taking your husbands last name is abandoning your father or culture, its just part of life. Im sure after having all girls your dad realized a long time ago that you guys wouldnt carry on the name.
Post # 4
Also, since you don’t want to hyphenate then I’m assuming (maybe incorrectly) that your children would take their father’s last name which means you wouldn’t be carrying on the legacy of your family name or culture anyway. The best way to carry on the legacy of your culture is to teach your children as much as possible about it and continue to practice the traditions.
Post # 5
I am not planning to legally change my last name, but will use my married name in social/personal settings. For my in-laws, friends etc, to call me Mrs. HisLastName isn’t a big deal. But if I legally changed it, I would have to change all of my licensure paperwork as well. I could technically still have clients call me by my maiden name, but it would be much more of a headache.
I think if you’re wanting to retain your maiden name for professional purposes, then don’t legally change it. Everyone in the world who knows you socially can still call you by your married name, even if that isn’t legally the case (how would they know??)
Post # 6
I don’t think anyone will be confused by your degrees being in a different name. People understand that women get married and often change their names.
The other stuff—an important consideration. But I wouldn’t worry too much about the degree thing. I’ll have two degrees in my maiden name, but that’s okay because I achieved those before I became a Mrs!
Post # 7
Most people assume that if you are married you took your husbands last name. When people hear where I went to high school, live etc (small town) people always ask me what my maiden name was (we’re the only family around with our last name so people aren’t usually familiar with it, and we haven’t really lived there as long as other families in the area).
I think in professional settings people aren’t surprised either way. It’s kind of a either/or with professional licenses. Women either want to keep their maiden name because that’s what patients and companies are used to, or we change our name. But either way I don’t think its confusing for anyone. No more confusing than a resturaunt employee changing their name.