- 7 years ago
I think at this point, and actually for awhile now, it’s safe to say that I’m engaged but waiting on the ring. SO and I both know that we want to get married and talk very openly about it.
We had a pretty good talk the other day in which I divulged to him that I wouldn’t leave him just because he didn’t propose because to me, you either want to spend the rest of your life with someone, or you don’t – no stipulations. He seemed pretty taken back by that, and not because he doesn’t feel the same way, I just don’t think he was ever expecting me to say that out loud. I told him how I don’t think a ring or a big ceremony was going to change what we have now as we both already have the mentality that we’re married. We won’t walk out just because we had a fight, and there’s really nothing short of infidelity that we can’t handle – and to be honest, I think we could survive that too. I told him that while I was secretly hoping to have my moment of “OMG, he proposed!” that life would go on and I would still breathe without it, and that what I was really looking forward to was the marriage – not the wedding.
So we talked some more about wedding expectations in which I don’t really have any. My mom has been married three times and his mom has been separated from her husband for YEARS, as well as many of our friends who married young are going downhill fast, so to both of us a ceremony doesn’t guarantee forever, it just means a lot of wasted money. I’m really just more about the marriage part, and I think it’s because I want to show everyone else that it CAN be done, and that not everyone fails as he and I have seen a lot of. (Of course though, this triggered a “what if we can’t make it?” response from him, in which I just replied, “then what are we doing here? You can’t live your life like thinking that, just take it one day at a time”.) We both agree that we don’t want to spend money for people to eat and drink for OUR big day, and I personally don’t want to deal with planning one, or deal with the “who do I invite?” drama, especially since I don’t have a father figure worth inviting – although, he may think he’s worth it.
So that being said, he mentioned that if he trully thought that I was okay with a courthouse wedding, we’d go tomorrow, but he thinks I’d regret it a few years down the road. You know? I don’t think I would. As long as we can have a family reception at home or at a park, where everyone BYOB’s, and brings food, and we get to celebrate our union stress free, that’s all that matters to me.
Anyways – the whole point of this was to say that there was progress, and after this talk we started talking more about rings. I really love halos, and the whole thing spurred an “okay, find me an affordable halo that you like”. After shopping around online, I did find something that I like, but it’s not a halo. So, I present to you the possible e-ring. It’s a 3/4 carat emerald cut solitaire. I agree that I love it, and he agrees that he’d buy it, we just need to see it in the store to verify. No date set when to see it – but I’m 90% sure that when we do I’ll love it! I’m not a flashy girl, so the 3/4 would be perfect, and I love the elegance exuded by the emerald cut.