(Closed) Proposal Tips

posted 5 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
1278 posts
Bumble bee

No, I’m not telling him how to propose.  I’d still like some sort of a surprise when we get engaged since the two of us have been so open about everything.  

It will be more special to me if he does it his way, instead of doing what I want.

Edit: After a cousin of mine got engaged at wedding recption, I did make a comment that I hate public proposals.  Other than that, I’ve told him nothing, I trust his judgement.

Post # 4
Member
2894 posts
Sugar bee

The only thing I requested was that he NOT do it in front of my friends and family. 1 – because I have performance anxiety. 2 – because it’s something I’d wanted to share with him for 2 whole seconds before anyone else became involved. Strangers were fine. Just not anyone else. He was really thoughtful and did it in our hotel room.

Post # 5
Member
3420 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

“Just make sure I look pretty!” I said. I really Do not want to be in PJs with my hair all messed up and my nails bit and chipped. I am not saying 5th Avenue pretty. Just…pretty

Post # 6
Member
4352 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I  told him he had to get down on one knee (while he was mid proposal). I also showed him the same picture of a ring I liked over and over again (for about a year). I didn’t give him any other pointers other than encouraging him to do it sooner vs later. I *might* have been impatient.

Post # 7
Member
543 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I basically planned out the entire thing, down to picking out my own ring. I told him it NEEDED to happen in Disney World–but even though I was about 99.9% sure I knew it was happening on vacation, he STILL managed to surprise me because he did it so immediately upon starting our vacation. I have been planning the perfect moment in my head so I didn’t mind that it was less of a surprise because he still added his own flair to it πŸ™‚

Post # 8
Member
857 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

No, and it is a pet peeve of mine when people do. It’s his proposal, let him do it however he wants to and is most comfortable. I wanted (and got) him to do it on his own terms, when he wanted to and how he wanted to. You know what? It was perfect and I was suprised and I wouldnt want it any other way. 

Post # 9
Member
9396 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Told him as long he didn’t scare me into thinking he was dead or injured I’d be okay with it. He showed me some video where it looked like the guy jumped off a building.  I told him NO.  Oh, and I told him he had to get down on one knee I think.

Post # 11
Member
159 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

My SO and I have talked about ring styles and metals (I have a nickel allergy) and we joke back and forth about stone size but the only real “rule” I gave him was that I didn’t want something hugely public with the exception of something at the drive in movie theater where we had our first date.  Even then, that’s a pretty private thing.

Post # 12
Member
1417 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@Meant2Bee:  Nope. I didn’t give him any ideas or clues to what I would want. I let him do everything on his own. ( even picking out the ring!) lol.

  I can’t waiiitt

Post # 13
Member
1311 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I don’t care how he would like to propose. We have our timeline (between now and December ).

I know SO is big on surprise however and did mention to him that if he really really wants to surprise me it’s best to catch me when I am really concentrating on something different or when I am not even enxpecting to see him because when we are together every moment seams to me like ”the moment”. When we are together, everything is just perfect πŸ™‚

 

Post # 14
Member
59 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I most definitely gave my hubby ideas. The reason I did this was because I empathize with the fact that HE has performance anxiety. I also did this, because I wanted to at least be clear about any specifics.. like, I didn’t think he had to get down on one knee or anything.

I wanted him to understand that I was totally not expecting anything over the top, I just wanted him to be true to himself, and that he wanted to be with me, of course.

Otherwise, I didn’t tell him anything else, it’s not like I said, you have to get on one knee, you better have a fat ring, and you better make me cry! Uh, no. Hahah!

But hey, some guys just don’t know what EXACTLY, you want. You could just give little pointers here and there like, when my friend got engaged I told him that I thought it was really romantic and ultra personal (they got engaged on a hike, on a vacation they planned for the two of them). I felt it was personal, because they both loved to hike and it was something they had always done together through out their relationship, and they were in a comfortable atmosphere for the both of them. I felt it was romantic, because it was during a vacation they planned for themselves, so they were on the some wave length.

I expressed, that I didn’t like the idea of being surprised when I’m mid-semester in college, stressing about a paper, trying to get ready for finals, or maybe my life is sort of a mess right now.  I explained that I wanted to be able to enjoy the moment isntead of being hung up on facts like (are you serious? right now? in the coffee shop, on a sunday morning, when I’m getting ready to study for a final? and my life is a mess right now?!) But that’s also because I have performance anxiety as well, and I can be a little highstrung when I’m stressed out.

I of course, when I saw said freinds ring, thought it was gorgeous, but expressed that I don’t expect anything like that, that I’d be content with a plain band for an egagement, or just a wedding band later on. I don’t like diamonds. 

She has a super gorgeous diamond solitaire, which is over the top for me, in fact, I don’t have an engagement ring, but that’s a story for another day.

I didn’t outwardly describe particulars, I just sort of gave boundary lines, so that it was still a surprise, anyways, but within what I wanted.

Specifics, could ruin things, if you want it to be a surprise!

Unless of course, you have it all layed out how you want it.. but, it could still be a surprise, anyways!

As a final thought: If you feel okay with giving pointers to your man about proposals.. do it then! πŸ™‚

Post # 15
Member
1311 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@FutureMrs.browneyes: Awwww, mine picked out the ring too… I can’t wait to see it πŸ™‚

 

Post # 16
Member
715 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

On our first date, we went to a hockey game and some guy proposed to his girlfriend on the jumbotron.  I turned to this guy that I barely knew and said “If this goes anywhere, you CANNOT propose on the jumbotron!”.  I look back now and realize how bold that was of me to tell him that on our first date, but it stuck! lol  He teased me for months as we were coming up to a proposal that he was going to propose on the jumbotron.  He teased so mercilessly that I actually started to dread going to any kind of sporting event with him because I thought he might just think it was funny. 

In the end, he proposed on the top deck of a cruise ship at 2am in the middle of the ocean with just me and him.  It was perfect πŸ™‚

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