Proposals

posted 2 years ago in Proposals
Post # 2
Member
73 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

Completely agreed. Not only with the proposals though. I went so far as to tell my fiancé I’m not postingand status change or anything on Facebook. Not only is it private and personal but I wouldn’t want anyone to see yet another engagement post and feel left out/like their partner doesn’t want to marry them. I’ve heard that one of my Facebook friends got so upset about all the recent engagement posts she went ape on her boyfriend and demanded he propose even though they’d only been going out a couple of months (Needless to say, they broke up soon after).

Also, not only might to person feel pressured into saying yes, what happens when they confess that they don’t want to go through with it, they felt pressured to say yes, and they want to break off the engagement?

Post # 3
Member
56 posts
Worker bee

Soooo 6 months into our relationship my SO and I went to Greece for a week. On one of the last nights we were there we went out drinking and on the way back to the room my not-so-sober man got down on one knee and said “noms…cake, you’re awesome, I love you, will you marry me?”. It was completely unexpected and it took me a few seconds to process the information. In that miniscule moment of delay, my wonderous SO decided that hey, while he was at chest level, he may as well lean in and…motorboat. Yes. He did that. During a proposal. So, while I still said yes, I asked that when we were financially able to get a ring, that he would ask again, but sans motorboating. And that he put a teeny ounce of thought into it. And by thought, I don’t mean a carriage ride and message on a goodyear blimp. I just want him to take a teeny bit of time to better communicate why he wants to be with me (he’s not the best communicating his emotions so this is a big deal to me). I don’t consider it a complete re-do, just an addendum to the original. I don’t think thats unreasonable to ask, but maybe it is?

 

Am I going to post it on Facebook asap and send everyone pictures of the ring? not a chance. I don’t think anyone should EVER be upset about their proposal solely because it wasn’t good enough of a story to put on Facebook. And I certainly don’t think anyone should be upset about their proposal because they are worried about what others will think. I do think that a fixation on an over the top proposal isn’t good for a relationship, but then again, what do I know? 

Post # 4
Member
314 posts
Helper bee

Would I love a grand gesture?  Sure.  Do I think I am going to get one?  Absolutely not.  I know my boyfriend bought the ring.  I know when he plans on giving me the ring.  He wants me to come with him to pick the ring up to ensure it fits since he bought it at a store that is a decent drive away.  Does this upset me?  Not at all.  In the grand scheme of things what really matters is I am marrying an awesome guy that I love so freaking much.  I don’t need a story to tell people.  I would never be upset if a proposal didn’t go how I planned.  Do people seriously get upset over that?  I realize life isn’t a romance movie, so I’m just happy with what I get. 

Post # 5
Member
308 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Bored6:  I agree, mine was in Jamaica, on our balcony in our hotel room, just the two of us. We didn’t tell anyone until after we told our family, we don’t have a FB so that was easy. I think everyone started figuring it out 4-6 months after we were actually engaged haha.

Post # 6
Member
6525 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Bored6:  I agree that proposal should be personal and meaningful. For example, my proposal, DH knows how much my dog Daisy means to me, and he found a way to incorporate her into the proposal and it was absolutely perfect. We didn’t live together at the time, we both lived at home with our parents and he made a copy of my key, and one weekend my mom went away and thats when he came to my mom’s house, waited for me to come home from work and boom, thats when it happend. 

However, there are some women who like a BIG proposal. And I think that if thats what they want, great. What I am not okay with is when the person doesn’t get the BIG proposal and throws a fit about it, I’ve seen it on WB. Thats when I want to scream and say ‘hey, you are missing the big picture’ Maybe their SO wasn’t comfortable with a big proposal, maybe they thought a more intimate proposal would be more romantic. Whatever the case is, when you get proposed to, you should be grateful and happy you are marrying the person you can’t picture your life without. Not make a big stink that your proposal wasn’t on some big screen, or in public…etc.

Post # 7
Member
339 posts
Helper bee

Oooh_snap:  This is me.  I’d love to be swept off my feet, but can’t imagine a grand gesture.  He’s very simple, not very romantic. But I love him just the same.

It’s also a very private thing to me – don’t plan on posting it on FB (maybe, maybe after a bit of time has passed) or on here.

Post # 8
Member
6332 posts
Bee Keeper

I really don’t have anything to say about this since I think that proposals of any shape and size are wonderful so long as it makes both parties happy.

What I really came here to say was that reading this sentence in my head just made my day:

noms…cake: “noms…cake, you’re awesome, I love you, will you marry me?”

Post # 9
Member
6727 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - A castle!

noms…cake:  OMG I’m sorry but I had to laugh at your story because it sounds JUST like something my DH would do. I hope you get your heartfelt proposal soon, but at least you do have a story you’ll never forget and will definitely look back and laugh about. 

Post # 10
Member
56 posts
Worker bee

FutureDrAtkins:  oh please laugh away! It cracks me up every time I think about it! Glad I’m not the only one that has a special guy that makes me laugh 😀

Post # 11
Member
2580 posts
Sugar bee

As a girl who is just fresh off of a very  grand proposal let me say that yes people  probably do feel some pressure via social media etc but some guys just are genuinely over the top romantics.

 

My now fiancé  doesn’t  have Facebook, pintrest  or any other site that would have made him feel like he had to propose like he did.He wanted to and plan to all on his own. Also even though it was over the top it was actually very private as he knows I don’t like lots of people. 

I posted it here because I was so impressed at all the effort he put in.I also do not have Facebook or anything else  so the only ones to know about this are the bees and close family. 

He could have proposed in our house in sweatpants and my answer would have been the same but he told me he gave me the proposal he thought I derserved.

Thats just my 2 cents

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