(Closed) Pushy Groomsman! Need Advice Please!

posted 5 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
Member
734 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I would tell him no because being there for a wedding is a big deal when you’re a groomsman and you can’t trust him because of past behavior. He’ll be invited but its not worth having a no-show in the bridal party just to keep him from being “hurt” (which I doubt he’d really be that hurt… he just might put up a fuss over pride). He sounds a teensy big proud and arrogant…

Post # 4
Member
1271 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Interesting. Where did the other two groomsmen come from to make it be 5?

Post # 5
Member
587 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I don’t think you should get involved in it. I understand why you’re annoyed but it’s his relationship to manage, not yours. I dont think you’d want him dictating how to handle issues with your friends, right?

Post # 6
Member
2782 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I say if your FI wants to give in let him, just prepare yourselves to not have any expectations of this guy helping or even showing up. I think if you hold your expectations low from the beginning, you won’t have to worry about getting upset when they come to fruitation, especially when we’re talking about a proven flaky groomsman.

Post # 7
Member
1199 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I would just say no. If he hasn’t made an effort to be in your guy’s life as a friend and ditch L’s wedding, I would nip that problem to avoid any future stress or “back of your head” thoughts that he’s going to be a no-show. Or other wise talk to him and let him know how you feel and make sure he will be commited. Maybe this will give you guys a chance to get close to him again. 

Post # 8
Member
507 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Eh, gotta let your man sort this one out. If you wouldn’t let him push one of your b.m’s out can’t do the same. TRUST. We have two groomsmen…one similiar to your sitch and a groomswoman who is just a bitc* that I’ve just decided in the end to accept because it’s more important to be united than pick fights over family/friends…

 

Now if your dude super doesn’t want this guy/the guy doesn’t approve of your matrimony…that is a whole nother situation

Post # 10
Member
7879 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I agree this is for FI to deal with, but why is “no” so hard to say?

Post # 11
Hostess
7568 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

I can understand your apprehension but this is really your FI’s choice. 

Post # 12
Member
6209 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

I would definitely encourage your FI to stand up for himself and say NO. This guy should not be in your wedding party if your FI doesn’t feel close to him. Your FI will be happier when the wedding rolls around and he doesn’t have to deal with him.

Post # 13
Member
1472 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@msuwxnerd:  I would say no just because he assumed after not talking for a year. And flaking on a mutual friend’s wedding. That’s insane.

The topic ‘Pushy Groomsman! Need Advice Please!’ is closed to new replies.

Get our weekly roundup of the best of Weddingbee.
I agree to receive emails from the site. I can withdraw my consent at any time by unsubscribing.

Find Amazing Vendors