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Question about honeymoon vs. store registry...from the giver's perspective

posted 1 year ago in Gifts and Registries
  • poll: Which registry would you prefer a gift from?
    Honeymoon Registry : (14 votes)
    58 %
    Traditional Store Registry : (10 votes)
    42 %
  •  
    1.
    Member
    1,675 posts
    Bumble bee
    farmersdaughter    June 26, 2010  

    Hey bees - 

    I have a friend getting married soon who is registered at a couple of traditional stores, and then she also has a honeymoon registry (via Traveler's Joy.) I have a couple of questions about this...

    1. With registries like Traveler's Joy, am I actually purchasing the item listed (such as breakfast in bed or spa treatments), or do they just get the money and can use it however they choose (on the honeymoon or otherwise)? I'm just a little confused about how that actually works.

    2. If you were the bride, would you prefer that people buy you actual gifts from the stores you registered at, or items off the honeymoon registry? (Selfishly, its more fun for me as the giver to buy her a gift I know she'll have in her home for a long time than just giving her money, but the whole point is to shower her with love, not make myself feel good!) I added a poll for this one...I might try asking her bridesmaids if they know what she wants more, but it'd be interesting to see how the hive votes on this.

     

    Thanks!

     
    2.
    Member
    4,376 posts
    Honey bee
    LGenz    May 21, 2011   New Jersey, Wedding in Clearwater, FL

    Is this for the wedding or the bridal shower? I always give $ for a wedding no matter where the couple is registered.

     
    3.
    Member
    1,675 posts
    Bumble bee
    farmersdaughter    June 26, 2010  

    This is for the wedding.

     
    4.
    Member
    4,376 posts
    Honey bee
    LGenz    May 21, 2011   New Jersey, Wedding in Clearwater, FL

    If cash/check wasn't an option I'd give from the honeymoon registry, I think physical gifts are for the shower only.

     
    5.
    Hostess
    3,884 posts
    Honey bee
    caszos    June 2010   Florida

    I think I would be interested in knowing a bit more about how a honeymoon fund worked.  If they just got the cash to use, I would probably just give them the cash in a card at the wedding.  If it actually went towards a specific thing, well maybe then. 

    Personally, I like buying gifts for people.  I'm that kind of person, plus I like to shop and find good deals. 

    As a bride, I would think that since she set up both registries they are open to receiving either kind of gift. 

     
    6.
    Member
    1,429 posts
    Bumble bee
    Neva    July 2010  

    As a giver, I almost always give cash...just because it is easier and because it is always appreciated. 

    However, if I HAD to choose between a traditional registry and a honeymoon registry, I would probably buy from the traditional registry.  I do like the idea of giving the couple something tangible they can have that they can always remember was a wedding present from me.  I was married for the first time twenty years ago.  The cash gifts are long gone, the marriage ended in divorce, but I still have most of those wedding presesnts and I still think fondly of the givers each time I use them.

    The other reason I'd prefer to give from a traditional registry is that it feels to me less like the couple is asking for money.  As I said, I usually do give money,at least $100 (and sometimes quite a bit more), depending on how well I know the couple.  But I don't want to be asked for money.  I don't mind if I give you cash as a wedding present if you use it towards your honeymoon, but a honeymoon registry feels more like the couple is asking for money.  A traditional registry feels more like the couple is just giving guidance on their taste rather than asking for presents.   I realize my attitude is not entirely rational but I can't help feeling that way.

    If I got a wedding invitation and found out the couple was registered both at a traditional gift registry AND a honeymoon registry, I'd likely just give cash.  Don't ask me why I'm ok with giving cash but not with the honeymoon registry.  I don't really know.

     

     
    7.
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    Member
    899 posts
    Busy bee
    OurWedding    August 13, 2011   South Carolina

    I'm not sure how Travelor's Joy works, but it depends on the site. Some honeymoon registry sites, the couple gets the money and some they actually get the item/service you purchased. Go to their Travelor's Joy website and research it a little. We plan to do a "Honey Fund" as well. For us, I'd probably rather have the Honey Fund gift. We plan to register at traditional stores but both of us have lived on our own for several years and have 2 homes full of most things that go on a traditional registry. I actually have 2 households (mom passed away a few months ago). I would love to have the most Amazing honeymoon ever! Either way, your friends will Love whichever you choose!! Good luck.

     
    8.
    Member
    8,945 posts
    Buzzing
    Beekeeper
    Mrs.KMM    July 17, 2010   Atlanta, GA (wedding in Indianapolis, IN)

    As both a bride and a guest purchasing a gift, I don't like honeymoon registries and would therefore not buy from one but would instead go for the traditional registry.  Like some of the PPs, I like giving the B&G something tangible where they will think of me when they use it and hopefully will have it in their home for a long time to come.  Like Neva, a honeymoon registry to me is just the B&G asking for cash which I find rude.

    If I was invited to a wedding that had no traditional registry and just a honeymoon registry, I would give them a check over purchasing from the honeymoon registry simply because I really don't care for them and won't support them.  The B&G still get the same gift but in a form and manner that I'm more okay with.

     

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