(Closed) Question about possible destination wedding

posted 9 years ago in South Asian
Post # 3
Member
11 posts
Newbee

I’m not planning to get married in India, but from what my cousins say, you basically need to hand the wedding over to someone else and/or make trips to India before the wedding to choose everything. I can’t deal with it, and my relatives would make it waaay too big, so I decided against a wedding in India. However, two of my cousins basically let their aunts plan their weddings, and they LOVED it and said it was totally stress-free!

Good luck, whatever you decide!

Post # 4
Member
376 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Input from Mom: If you get hitched in India, do so under the Special Marriages Act, not the Hindu/Muslim Marriage Acts, even if you are very devout, because this will give more legal rights to the woman. Some examples are property and who gets custody of the children in the event of separation, loss, etc.

Post # 5
Member
355 posts
Helper bee

I think it really depends on you.  If you are one of those girls that has always dreamed of planning every detail of your wedding, do NOT get married in India.  For my first marriage, I got married in India (ex’s parents lived there) and didn’t even pick my sari (that was actually fine with me, exMIL and exSIL had excellent taste).  From my point of view, my family (who are local) would always be a part of our day to day lives and so this was one way to let his family be a part of our lives and I know they appreciated it (although they probably never fully understood the concept of “it’s the bride’s day” like we say in the US).  Plus exFIL was extremely social and loved to entertain so having 1200 (no joke) of his closest frends there at a multi-day psuedo-bollywood spectacle was a big thing for him whereas my parents were very content to host a reception here locally with for our family and friends.  That was enough planning for me to have my fill of picking colors, playlist for deejay, etc.  A couple of other things to consider — will many of your family/friends make it to India for it and will it bother you if not?  Also, a wedding in India can mean you are not star of the show, but rather the wedding serves an excuse for a desi-fest focused on chatter and endless eating and the ceremony is a sideshow.  Personally, I was happy not to have the attention but I did feel the ceremony was a lot less personal than weddings (even Indian ones) I have seen in the US.

 

 

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