Weddingbee boards

We've always wanted to do an international DW wedding but I am starting to wonder if its worth all the stress I think it may be. 

I always pictured it carefree (ha) and amazing but last night it dawned on me that it will basically be like a family vacation with his fam and my fam.  Insert fears of stress, nagging about everything under the sun- air, hotel, transportation, etc- family getting on my nerves, worrying about if everyone got there safe, if they like the hotel, etc.  I love them all but being stuck abroad with everyone just might put me over the edge.  I mean, I would never willingly agree to go on a vacation with both fams... ever.  Doesnt sound fun to me at all.  Or is it more like I just really see everyone for rehearsal and on wedding day?  I'm so confused.  

Ladies, how was your experience with a DW / how has it been planning so far? Is everyone asking you about all the details instead of the travel agent?  Are you ready to throw your hands up and say I give up? Or are things going great?  I want to know what I'm getting myself into before it's too late. 

I didn't have a destination wedding, but I've been to several.

The most enjoyable one was where the bride had a planner at the destination location.  If you're not getting married at an all inclusive resort that has someone on staff, having a go to person in that country is invaluable.

If you are getting married at an all inclusive resort, I think that the stress is probably less of an issue because you don't have to plan for transportation from a hotel to your venue.  I've heard friends who were surprised at how much it cost to have food for an event at an all inclusive, especially since if you weren't at a wedding, your dinner would be free!

You should save money on the wedding overall, since fewer guests will come.  Destination weddings are fun because the group who does come will become close friends and it's great to see them all interacting together.

Weddings will be stressful no matter if you get married in your own country or another one. There's no way around it.  It seems as though when it comes to your wedding, everyone you know loses their common sense and can't do anything for themselves.  

If you have a travel agent, you're definitely on the right path!

The last destination wedding we went to, our airline went on strike the day before we were supposed to go home.  Our travel agent e-mailed us and left messages on our cell phones letting us know what our options were.  She was incredibly helpful before the trip, during the trip, and even after the trip.

I completely understand how being in a foreign country with your parents and in-laws seems to be troubling!  Make sure that you and your FI have at least one separate room that parents are not staying in and you can go to find some peace.

Don't honeymoon where the wedding is.  Spend a few days celebrating with the families and then get out!

Good luck!

I'm currently planning our DW for Oct, so getting down the wire. 

Here are some responses to your fears:

1. Stressing about nagging family: I've sent out maybe 3 or 4 emails top w/ things like good airfare deals, how to reserve the rooms, reminder to reserve the rooms and info on international travel. Most of our guests would have had to fly to our state for the wedding, so asking them to fly to MX instead of MN wasn't too hard for them. We're about 7 weeks out and only 3 pairs of guests have yet to make their travel plans, but i'm not worried about any of them. 

2. Being stuck with everyone: A wedding will usually be like a big family reunion anyway, just normally in your home town. When you arrive at your resort, you'll have tons of meetings... meet the photographer, DJ, baker, florist, hair trials, venue walk throughs, etc. I've already gotten my schedule and we have something pretty much all morning in the three days prior to our wedding.  ALSO, most of our guests aren't even flying in until the day before the rehearsal (flying in on Weds, rehearsal Thurs, Wedding on Friday). SO, we really won't see them unless we run into them at the pool :) It's our vacation too! 

Honestly, they're going to want to be by the pool, drinking at the bar, golfing whatever.... enjoying their vacation. 

3. Planning it:

  a. Easy. Easy. Easy. The hardest part was finding a resort. We had a couple things we needed, family friendly, not all inclusive (more $$ for families than non-inclusive), and a direct flight option from most major cities. We chose Cabo San Lucas.

My planner is awesome and included in the price of our wedding at the resort. We are probably paying extra b/c it's not at an all inclusive, but I couldn't be happier with the experience. Anything I want I've been able to get, all with just an email. It's like having a fairy-god-mother-wedding-planner. I send her my idea, she replies with options and prices, I choose. That's it. LOVE IT. They have pictures of centerpieces, cakes, lighting, etc that you can pick from, or you can send a picture and she prices it out. 

b. I did not get a travel agent. We will have about 30 people, who are flying in from Mpls, Chicago, LA, Indiana, Omaha & Kansas City... and most of our friends know how to book a flight. I looked up some average airfares from their city to Cabo and gave them the avg price, so they knew what was "expensive". We also booked the resort ourself and contracted a group rate (10+ rooms) which dropped the room rate from around $300/night to $158/night. Now, I could end up wishing I had an agent if something terrible happens around the wedding but honestly, I have faith it'll be okay.  

Thank you for your responses, they have been very helpful!  I think I got caught up in a moment of stress because it seems liek this is completely do-able.  And you are right, most people wont be flying in days before the wedding.