(Closed) Question for Married DW Ladies / Those in the Midst of Planning

posted 8 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 3
3219 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

We are having a Destination Wedding with a home town reception.

And I have to say I dont think one but abut the DW! I have a dress FH has his clothes thats all we need!

Post # 4
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2018

I didn’t have a destination wedding, but I’ve been to several.

The most enjoyable one was where the bride had a planner at the destination location.  If you’re not getting married at an all inclusive resort that has someone on staff, having a go to person in that country is invaluable.

If you are getting married at an all inclusive resort, I think that the stress is probably less of an issue because you don’t have to plan for transportation from a hotel to your venue.  I’ve heard friends who were surprised at how much it cost to have food for an event at an all inclusive, especially since if you weren’t at a wedding, your dinner would be free!

You should save money on the wedding overall, since fewer guests will come.  Destination weddings are fun because the group who does come will become close friends and it’s great to see them all interacting together.

Weddings will be stressful no matter if you get married in your own country or another one. There’s no way around it.  It seems as though when it comes to your wedding, everyone you know loses their common sense and can’t do anything for themselves.  

If you have a travel agent, you’re definitely on the right path!

The last destination wedding we went to, our airline went on strike the day before we were supposed to go home.  Our travel agent e-mailed us and left messages on our cell phones letting us know what our options were.  She was incredibly helpful before the trip, during the trip, and even after the trip.

I completely understand how being in a foreign country with your parents and in-laws seems to be troubling!  Make sure that you and your Fiance have at least one separate room that parents are not staying in and you can go to find some peace.

Don’t honeymoon where the wedding is.  Spend a few days celebrating with the families and then get out!

Good luck!


Post # 5
376 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I’m currently planning our Destination Wedding for Oct, so getting down the wire. 

Here are some responses to your fears:

1. Stressing about nagging family: I’ve sent out maybe 3 or 4 emails top w/ things like good airfare deals, how to reserve the rooms, reminder to reserve the rooms and info on international travel. Most of our guests would have had to fly to our state for the wedding, so asking them to fly to MX instead of MN wasn’t too hard for them. We’re about 7 weeks out and only 3 pairs of guests have yet to make their travel plans, but i’m not worried about any of them. 

2. Being stuck with everyone: A wedding will usually be like a big family reunion anyway, just normally in your home town. When you arrive at your resort, you’ll have tons of meetings… meet the photographer, DJ, baker, florist, hair trials, venue walk throughs, etc. I’ve already gotten my schedule and we have something pretty much all morning in the three days prior to our wedding.  ALSO, most of our guests aren’t even flying in until the day before the rehearsal (flying in on Weds, rehearsal Thurs, Wedding on Friday). SO, we really won’t see them unless we run into them at the pool 🙂 It’s our vacation too! 

Honestly, they’re going to want to be by the pool, drinking at the bar, golfing whatever…. enjoying their vacation. 

3. Planning it:

  a. Easy. Easy. Easy. The hardest part was finding a resort. We had a couple things we needed, family friendly, not all inclusive (more $$ for families than non-inclusive), and a direct flight option from most major cities. We chose Cabo San Lucas.

My planner is awesome and included in the price of our wedding at the resort. We are probably paying extra b/c it’s not at an all inclusive, but I couldn’t be happier with the experience. Anything I want I’ve been able to get, all with just an email. It’s like having a fairy-god-mother-wedding-planner. I send her my idea, she replies with options and prices, I choose. That’s it. LOVE IT. They have pictures of centerpieces, cakes, lighting, etc that you can pick from, or you can send a picture and she prices it out. 

b. I did not get a travel agent. We will have about 30 people, who are flying in from Mpls, Chicago, LA, Indiana, Omaha & Kansas City… and most of our friends know how to book a flight. I looked up some average airfares from their city to Cabo and gave them the avg price, so they knew what was “expensive”. We also booked the resort ourself and contracted a group rate (10+ rooms) which dropped the room rate from around $300/night to $158/night. Now, I could end up wishing I had an agent if something terrible happens around the wedding but honestly, I have faith it’ll be okay.  

Post # 7
15 posts
  • Wedding: October 2011

We are having a Destination Wedding and have let our guests know that they should consider it a vacation for themselves, and that the only times will be able to see them is for the designated wedding activities. I understand your pain 😉 Just make it known to them that this is part of your honeymoon and would like to be by yourselves for a few days.

Post # 8
2538 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I had one and it was stressful. Here’s why:

  • Venue Coordinator offered to help by booking our band, caterer, florist for archway, and hair stylist. She did nothing; however, she lied and said she did it all. 5 weeks before the wedding, we found out the truth. Her boss took over, got us a band, but didn’t actually check with the band to make sure they were available before promising. Less than two weeks before the wedding no band. My Dad stepped in and handled it because he works in radio.
  • Our officiant was chosen because she had the most positive reviews online, very responsive to emails and calls, and very nice on the phone. Let us customize our wedding and she has all these certifications. Well, she was 45 minutes late, so instead of starting at noon, our wedding started at 12:45ish. No one could hear a word she said, she brought her 40ish year old daughter, they both butted in front of the appitizer line, and they both drank our alcohol. 
  • Although our cake was delicious, I had to drive it to the destination a few hours away and hope there weren’t any sudden stops. Nothing happened and it was fabulous.

That said, we loved our location, but I will never trust someone who says that they’ll handle it for me or reviews and quick, nice responses.

Post # 9
11 posts
  • Wedding: August 2010

Hello!  I just recently got married in Aruba and it was the greatest time!!!!! We have no regrets AT ALL. With that said, obviously you will need to do research online to learn more about the venue, the wedding coordinator and the vendors the hotel works with.  The most stressful part was how slow they would respond to me!  Eventually things would get done and everything was perfect. 

I am a worrywart as well but I have to tell you that once I got there, I was hanging out with my guests by the pool and beach everyday leading up to the wedding.  Once we arrived, we met with the wedding coordinator for half an hour to go over the way he would set things up and we were on our merry way to enjoy our wed-cation! 

As for the family situation, we arrived to Aruba on Thursday and told most of our family to arrive on Sunday.  The wedding was on Monday.  This way, this gave us ample time to hang out with our friends and we had a rehearsal dinner with only our family and bridal party on Sunday.  Maybe this is something you can look into?  We really didn’t feel obligated to hang with anyone since everyone was traveling in groups or with their significant others.

I think you should do what makes you happy.  There will always be the complainer/nay-sayer/debbie downer of a group, you won’t be able to please everyone so please yourself first!

Post # 10
916 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2010 - Al Cielo / La Laguna

We are getting married in the Riviera Maya and I think the stress has been about the same as back home.  We did make the decision early on to use a travel agent and it was probably the best idea we had.  If any of our family has questions or just wants to whine I sent them to the travel agent. 

Plus the resort we are staying at is very large so we ask the travel agent to put everyone else in a different section than us so we probably won’t see most of them except for wedding events.  I have to say though everyone has been so sweet about telling us how they are going to leave us alone since its our honeymoon. =)

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