Post # 1
My future-mother-in-law just emailed me and said that in a typical American wedding, the groom and bride will go to each table and thank the guests for coming. I’ve never been to an American wedding and am hoping someone can give me an idea of what the bride and groom needs to do.
Also, because we are having an afternoon wedding. My future-mother-in-law decided that she’s gonna invite everyone over to her place for an after-party. My fiance’s family wants us to be there and has been putting a lot of pressure on me. My question is do the newly-wed really have to go to the after-party? I can’t imagine how tired I’ll be after getting up 5 in the morning to do hair and makeup, having a wedding and then having to be requested to go to an after-party. Doesn’t most newly-weds go on their honeymoon straight after?
Post # 3
usually the couple will get their food before everyone else, eat, and then start their rounds at all the tables to greet all of the guests. it seems to be the easiest way to make sure that you get to talk to every single person, since you will be so busy. it’s not a big deal, all you do is go around to the tables and like you fmil said, thank people for coming. you don’t need to stay long at each table.
as for the after party, if you don’t want to go than i’d talk to your fi about it. we didn’t go to our honeymoon until a week after the wedding, we wanted time to relax and didn’t want to have to pack while getting ready for the wedding. but people do it differently, lots of brides and grooms do after parties. but i agree with you, you’ll be tired!
Post # 4
As an alternate to going to each table, you can do a receiving line. So for instance, when your guests are going into the room where you’ll be having the reception, you, your FH and both sets of parents and the wedding party line up and you shake hands and say thank you to each guest before they go into the room. It’s personal preference. At my wedding, we’re going to do the receiving line because I really want to sit down and eat my first meal with my husband in peace!
As for going to the after party, I would probably put in an appearance to make your FMIL happy, but I would make it clear that you’re not staying for the whole thing. The adrenaline of the day may carry you through it and maybe you’ll have a great time, you never know! In any case, make sure you go even if it’s just for an hour so you don’t regret it later 🙂
Post # 5
Thank you for your suggestions artbee and bakerella 🙂 I feel much better about going around to the guests now. I felt like I was an animal on exhibition! I like the idea of having a receiving line. I do want to enjoy my meal too.
As for the after-party, I’ll make sure my fiance tells his mom that we’re not planning on staying for the entire nite.
Post # 6
Another “receiving line” option I have seen was outside of the church or ceremony venue, the bride, groom, wedding party, and parents all line up as people are exiting the church and thank everyone.
How big is your wedding going to be? One thing I will say in favor of the going to tables method vs. receiving line– at least you can take some breaks or sit down for a second going around to tables. I was a BM in a BIG wedding and the receiving line took FOREVER. My shoes were killing me and I would have paid so much money to be able to sit down!
Post # 7
It’s just a small wedding MsTerrapin. I will have around 80 guests.
Post # 8
OK, with 80 guests, I think either the receiving line or the going to tables method would work for you and be fun and painless!