Quitting smoking before wedding – tips, advice, personal stories? We need help!

posted 3 years ago in Wellness
Post # 4
9412 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@MissMaya:  Good for you for making this decision. I am not a smoker and I never was but my husband was a very heavy smoker when we met. I essentially told him that I wouldn’t continue seeing him unless he quit. Oddly, he had no problems with it and quit cold turkey. I know that not everyone can do that, but it is the method that worked best for him.

I will say that he did gain some weight since, so I think it is important to be aware of that possibility. I would recommend incorporating some physical activity at the same time you are quitting – it will not only give you something distracting to do together (yay rock climbing or a fun new hobby) but it will combat the unhealthy weight gain (my man has since lost it all).

People won’t change unless they want to, so you have both made the most important first step – commitment!

Post # 5
551 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@MissMaya:  ugh, good luck! it’s so hard! i reached a point where i was so DONE with it that i was able to quit cold turkey. it’s been over 2 years since my last cigarette! i honestly don’t know how i did it. sometimes i’ll have dreams where i chain smoked and wake up craving one. but then i’m like nope!!! what helped motivate me to quit was those scary commercials about strokes and cancer, ha.  and thinking about having children. mind over matter! you can do it!!!!!!!!!!!


oh, and don’t be around people that smoke for awhile. haha. 

Post # 6
4638 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@MissMaya:  My FI and I quit smoking over 5 years ago. Truthfully we quit cold turkey and had zero issue doing so. We had been dating for only a few months and were madly in love, we discussed the fact that if we continued smoking there was a good chance we couldn’t live a long healthy life together. Realizing how much it would hurt the other if one of us got sick or died from something we could’ve prevented, made it easy for us.

Post # 7
582 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I was a smoker for over 40 years. You read that right.

i wanted to be a non smoker on my wedding day. I have never not smoked. My car would not start without a cigarette ! Nicotine addiction is horrible. If you’ve never been a smoker, you wouldn’t understand that last statement. I am not here to be judged for how long I’ve smoked, or how bad smoking is, or how I have cut my life short. I Am Here to encourage and give hope to OP.

ON May 23, I bought a Vape system. 18 mg. liquid. I crumbled up the pack of cigarettes and prayed.  1 month later, cut to 12 mg, 1 month after that, 6 mg, 1 month after that 3 mg. 

Today, 20 weeks, 6 days, and 14 minutes later I have not smoked a cigarette and use the Vape with 0 mg. of nicotine just occasionally when stressed or I get a craving. Fot me the Vape system is nothing short of a miracle for me. 

I hope this helps you. I am happy and grateful that I don’t smoke cigarettes today. Good luck to you.

Post # 8
1340 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@MissMaya:  I quit smoking October 4, 2008 and have not smoked a single cigarette since then!! Every year when this date rolls around, I am so very proud of myself. I had smoked for 13 years.

I used the Quit for Life program https://www.quitnow.net/programlookup/

My health insurance plan through work at the time paid for it 100%. Their concept is simple and powerful. I recommend it to everyone!!

I chose nicotine gum to wean me off the nicotine. It worked very well when I used I followed the directions to a T. When I veered away from following the directions, it didn’t work as well, lol. I used it for a month and was done. They recommend 6 weeks, but I really was done completely.

I started a workout program when I quit and was amazed by how strong my body was and how well I could breathe. My endurance was soooo vastly improved, it was incredible! It motivated me sooo much!

Also, within about a month, my skin looked AMAZING and my hair felt incredible. I had NO IDEA that my smoking was killing my hair and skin that badly!! All of a sudden, I was glowing and rosy cheeked with shiny hair. Hell yeah!

I was very aware of the possibility that I would try to compensate my addiction with food, so I wouldn’t say I overate. My food did taste much, much better and the flavors more complex. So I can see why some people might go crazy eating even if it isn’t about fulfilling an oral fixation! Since I have quit, I also use barely any salt in my food and can’t tolerate too much sweetness in food. Both lead to beneficial health effects!

I did not gain weight because for the first time in a LONG time, I was very vigilant about my workout routine. I was also terrified of gaining weight, but felt it was worth it if it happened.

I found that I needed to reach the point where I wanted to quit within myself and do it for myself only in order to be successful. So that is something to think about when you and your husband quit together. Do not define your success by his and vice versa. 

BEST OF LUCK!!! You are going to be SO HAPPY you took this amazing step!!!

Post # 9
1362 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley

My FI smoked for 8 years.  He took 3 weeks worth of Chantix and has been 6 months without smoking now.  It was the only thing that worked for him.  He had no adverse side-effects.

Post # 10
926 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

@MissMaya:  I haven’t smoked since June 27th. I used the patch to quit because I just could not do it cold turkey. The patch helped take the edge off but I did have some crazy dreams for a while. I also chewed a TON of gum and stayed in for a few weeks so as not to be around my smoker friends.I used the full 3 month program and I don’t crave cigarettes at all anymore during my day to day.  Sometimes when I’m out around smokers I want one but I have enough willpower now to choose not to. I was pretty eager to be done with all forms of nicotine once I made the decision to quit, but I don’t think I could have done it without the patch. 

Post # 11
810 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Wonderful!! Be proud of yourself for making the decision that you want to be a non-smoker! That’s often harder than some people can take!

I quit smoking for my mom’s 50th birthday. It served as a gift to her and gave me a hard cut off date, like your wedding date. My partner at the time did not smoke, but FI (who was my roommate then) DID smoke. It is much easier if you have a supportive partner who is not lighting up in front of you. Be a united front. It sucks, is hard, you’ll have a range of emotions and you will survive all of it. It is only temporary!! I have now been smoke-free way to be for 4 years now, and it was the best decision I have made for myself. I save money, smell better, taste more flavors, have more stamina and can breathe!!

I tapered down over a couple of weeks. I was a pack and a half a day smoker. I cut down 5 cigarettes from that for a few days. Then I’d cut out a few more. I had tried cold turkey before and it did not work for me. By the night before my mom’s birthday I was having 1 per day. Her birthday hit and I was done. I had to find other things to satisfy the oral and hand fixation. That’s a big part of it was doing somethign with your hands. Suckers, candy, chewing on a pen. Whatever you find works for you.

The frist few weeks are the hardest. Best thing to do is not put yourself in situations where you would normally smoke a lot. I didn’t go to the bar b/c after drinking I’d want to smoke. I didn’t go for joy rides b/c I loved smoking in my car. I was careful with what I did and kept in mind the big picture, and why I was doing it. I had nightmares about smoking for weeks (which was really bizarre). Now I can’t stand the smell of them.

It isn’t easy, and everyone knows that. But it is SO worth it. Start taking a good walk every day or go for a run. I did gain weight as I was quitting b/c I ate instead of smoked. Be cognizant of what’s going into your mouth and stay moving. Do it together and help each other stay strong!! Best of luck to you!!

Post # 12
1157 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I have never smoked but I’m a public health person and I just wanted to chime in to encourage you. You can do it! 

Of the family and friends I’ve known who have quit, most have quit cold turkey which is impressive. However, my cousin’s husband used some form of light therapy and apparently it worked like a miracle. He’s totally not the kind of person who would fall for any bullshit either, I was utterly shocked when he told me that’s how he did it. 

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with using the patch or the gum- the chemical addiction is really powerful and has rewired circuits in your brain. Using quitting aids to step down is reasonable in my opinion, but you have to also address the social/psychological habit aspect too. 

Good luck! You will be so happy once you quit and after a while you won’t be able to believe you ever did that to your body!

Post # 13
217 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

My DH and I recently quit (3 weeks…woohoo)!  We’ve been using electronic cigs as a way to still get the nicotine to slowly wean off and to still have the “act” of smoking.  Just the act of going outside to “smoke” has really helped.  We plan on doing this until the new year then we will either get one of the refillable cigs with the non-nicotine cartridges or just stop altogether.  Good luck! I already feel so much better and can’t believe I ever started!  My DH is sleeping so much better and we still feel super strong.  Good luck!


Post # 14
16 posts
  • Wedding: January 2014

I quit “cold turkey” last year – smoked for 14 years.  My doctor gave me Wellbutrin which helped and I still take it today, it definately curves the cravings.  It is not for everyone, but something to look into with your doc.


My mom decided to quit smoking 5 weeks ago at the age of 61.  SHe has been using the electronic cigarette and it helps her tremendously.  She hasnt touched a cig since.


You can do it and just think how much better you will feel! Good luck 🙂

Post # 15
9859 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

I smoked for 5 years, I kept quitting and picking it up again.  This time 10 years ago I was a pack a day smoker.  I started dating my now FH 9 years ago – still smoking a pack a day.  10 years ago this coming easter, his grandmother died from smoking related illnesses.  He made me quit.  It wasn’t easy, I found it easier to cut back slowly.  I just stopped brining a full pack with me anywhere, I would bring one or 2 with me and that had to get me through the day.  I then stopped altogether.  Thankfully, many of my friends quit at the same time, so the social aspect wasn’t there anymore.  It was tough.  When I would go to the convenience store and see all those cigarettes lined up was really hard – so I bought a scratch ticket, walked home and scratch the ticket – that usually kept me occupied long enough for the craving to pass – I did stumble a couple times over the last few years (usually when seriously intoxicated).  But it has now been 4 years and counting since I’ve had a cigarette 🙂

I know people who have used the gum, the patches, the vape – all of it.  It depends on what works for you.  Doing it together is a great idea.

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