(Closed) RANT: FI’s stupid friend rsvped with “plus one.”

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
51 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

We’re in a similar situation. We’re inviting most of his fraternity brothers and we’re including “plus one” for all of them so they can bring a date if they want. I don’t really want a bunch of random people we don’t know there but another brother in the house got married this summer and some of the guys didn’t go because they couldn’t bring a random date. 

Post # 4
Member
3461 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Fraternity guys are funny.  Apparently in my FI’s fraternity, it’s considered 100% ok to invite the guys to the bachelor party but not the wedding.  They’ll be offended actually, if they aren’t invited to the bachelor party (and would prioritize attending it).  These guys are 15 years out of college, married, with kids – so we’re not talking fresh out bachelors.

Post # 5
Member
735 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Is there a chance that he just didn’t realize he was supposed to fill in the name, and just wanted you to know that he is bringing a date?  (Was the invitation addressed to “Mr. Frat Brother, plus one”?)

When I was shortly out of college I had several friends get married, but I hadn’t ever been invited to a wedding where I wasn’t considered a “child relative”.  I think I was guilty of not providing a name of the guest… I know I committed other faux pas!

Post # 6
Member
3167 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

well one of FH’s friends RSVPed plus 6. we’ve had multiples on his side RSVP with “+1 i don’t know who yet”. so uhh… join the wtf club.

Post # 7
Member
3369 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I don’t understand why ‘plus one’ is a bad thing?  After we sent out invited, I teased the two single male friends we invited about what kind of date they were bringing… were they supposed to give me the names of their dates beforehand? 

Post # 8
Member
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

We had two of DH’s guy friends do that, and they aren’t even close friends. One of them was from out of state and had the nerve to ask if he and his uninvited date could stay at our house before and on the wedding day, because he didn’t want to spend any money on a hotel room.

Post # 9
Member
3167 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@jjmomma: i don’t have a problem with plus ones at all, especially if they wont know anyone else there. but when i address the invite to a couple and one half RSVPs with a “+1 someone i don’t know yet” (yes those exact words – what, are they waiting to meet someone? lol) that’s weird. so is RSVPing with 3 extra people. or 6. especially when they’re FH’s family and will know 1/3 of the guests there! some people do escort/table cards and need the names beforehand.

Post # 10
Member
3369 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

@AprilJo2011:  Seriously?  Who does that?  And you could do their laundry and make breakfast in bed… it’s just your WEDDING DAY!! 

Post # 11
Member
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@jjmomma: If you don’t invite somebody with a +1, then they are not supposed to bring one. Many brides draw the line at wives/husbands, fiance(e)s, sometimes serious girlfriends/boyfriends.  In that case, it would be more polite to put their name on the invitation than +1.

If you invite all your single guests with a +1, then they can bring anybody they want; the flavor of the week, friend with benefit, frat buddy, their grandma…

Post # 12
Member
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@jjmomma: Hahaha, yes, I couldn’t believe it either! DH nicely told them while staying at our house was not an option, he would help them find cheap accomodations. They ended up getting a motel room.

I let both uninvited +1s slip, since it looked like we wouldn’t meet our venue minimum anyway.

Post # 13
Member
2496 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 1991

@AprilJo2011: Bahaha… flavor of the week!  I like that one. 🙂

We didn’t run into this, but we also wrote in the invited guests names on the RSVP cards so all they had to do was check yes or no.  I really wished we could have done plus ones for everyone, but there were only a handful of single guests and they all knew each other.  I just made sure to seat them together, so for us, we lucked out that it wasn’t a big deal to them.

I would be very tempted to write “Plus One” on her escort card….

Post # 14
Member
3369 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

@elliestan: Ohhh!  I didn’t catch on that he actually wrote “someone I don’t know yet”…

@AprilJo2011: We has such a small wedding, I didn’t have to look into etiquette or plan seating.  It would get interesting with several flavors of the month together in room!  lol 

Post # 15
Member
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@jjmomma: It sure is interesting to look at our pictures! “Who is this?!” “Wasn’t that x’s date?” “Yeah, I think you’re right! Are they still dating?” “Oh, I don’t know!” Lol!

Post # 16
Member
649 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

I’d make the escort card read his name & Plus One!

The topic ‘RANT: FI’s stupid friend rsvped with “plus one.”’ is closed to new replies.

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