Rant: My fiance is driving me nuts!

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Hostess
30313 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@ellie-b:  Oh my gosh, ALL THE TIME! >.<  Haha, it’s gotten better around here – while DH loves his video games and his own time, with a couple years of marriage under his belt, he’s now better at sensing that I need him to do this or that.  😛  It’s a “men” thing, I promise!  Men.

Post # 4
Member
275 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@ellie-b:  men are, for lack of a better word, clueless! I have learned to come right and say hey hun could you do the dishes? I’d really super appreciate it. We also have a system off need and want. If its just something I’d like him to do, I say I want you to vacuum if you can that’d be great. But if its something that’s super important to my well being then I say hey I need you to this, can you?  DH does the same so that this way we know when something is super important or when it can be done later. But trust me, it takes a very emotionally intuitive man to pick up on clues about what you need, and those guys are few and far between. 🙂

Post # 5
Member
4831 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@SeaTurtle88:  I completely agree. Why beat around the bush? As long as you ask nicely and reciprocate, I think it’s better to be direct and ask for what you want. 

Post # 6
Member
68 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Same boat, 100%. I’m really looking forward to my life retuning to normal in October!! 

Post # 8
Member
2355 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@ellie-b:  I just read through this and was going to tell you to let him know in definite terms that you need some help with housework. I see you already did. Good! You’re right; men aren’t mind readers.

Post # 9
Member
697 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Dude — can relate completely to this. You’re not alone!

Post # 10
Member
67 posts
Worker bee

Men are oblivious. I learned in the first year of dating and living with my then-boyfriend, now-husband, that I had to explicitly ask him for help. We split the chores fairly evenly. I do a bit more now because I am actively searching for employment while he’s at work, but still; he helps because I ask him to. I’ve found that with men, usually, if you ask, they will help. They can’t take a hint, they need the sledgehammer!

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