(Closed) Rant: Sister issues

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
7082 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2009

I found the best way to neutralize the squeeky wheel was to let her pick.  I didn’t care what the girls wore, so I said they could wear the same thing or different dresses.  Ultimately they decided that they’d all wear the same inexpensive DB Bridesmaid dress.  Disaster averted!

Post # 5
Member
563 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I think DG  may have meant that if all of the other bridesmaids are very flexible and nice like you, you can give YS a budget and let her choose the dress for everyone.  The only potential risk here is that I am a bit concerned that YS is describing herself and you as “old” which (besides being insane) makes me worry that she may be really jealous of your sister’s marriage and might choose a really inappropriate dress and continue to act up in the future.  I’d ask her to look at dresses in a reasonable price range for all of the bridesmaids, and let the bride maintain veto power.  

Oh, and if possible, please keep in mind that people usually hate their bridesmaid dresses – my favorite was the one we called the “bubble boob dress” that made my chest region look like there was a layer of bubble wrap between my dress and my breasts.  The seamstress took one look at me and told me I needed a padded bra.  I looked at her strangely, and when I took off the dress she was shocked to realize I am a very full C cup, and she said, “wow, I had no idea that you had breasts in that dress!”  

Post # 7
Member
7082 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2009

Our squeaky wheel had some of the similar issues as Brianalaura is describing.  I thought it was only the 3 bridesmaids, so maybe if YS got to put forth her suggestions, the more mature girls could find one of YS’s options that might be able to work for them.

For us, it just completely neutralized the drama, but I understand that it might not work for everyone (especially with maternity concerns)!  Needless to say it should be something that the bride can live with… and that will work for the pregnant bridesmaid.  I’m starting to think same fabric, same color, different dresses might be the way to go.

Trust me when I say I feel for you and have walked a mile in those shoes!

Post # 8
Member
563 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Oh wow – I’m sorry you are in this position! It can’t be easy negotiating all of these concerns, and it is tough finding maternity bridesmaid dresses that look nice.

I know your sister wanted matching dresses, but would she be happy with everyone wearing the same color/fabric?  Some bridesmaid lines allow you to pick one color/fabric and coordinate the dresses that way.  I had four bridesmaids, and one was 8 months pregnant.  Since I hated all the maternity bridesmaid dresses I saw, I asked her to just buy any dress she liked in black (since I figured I wouldn’t want to wear anything but black when I was that far along).  She bought a beautiful dress, and looked gorgeous (everyone else was in the same red dress, so I was happy with the way they looked together since I like the way black goes with red).  Maybe that will make your sister happy?   

 

 

Post # 9
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Could they all wear dresses of different styles in the same color? That would still give them a cohesive look.

Post # 11
Member
84 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I have somewhat of an issue myself with my bridesmaids all being completely different, but we just went with a separates idea so that they could all pick whichever looked best on them and it wasnt too expensive.  I think it worked out pretty well!  I hope your sisters resolve things!  But sometimes it is better to just let them pick I think.

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