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I think a real one would work, but you could always use Etsy Alchemy to request a red flower.
I would suggest a fake flower---real flowers wilt pretty easily and I don't think you would want a limpy flower in your hair!
I'm in the process of making red ones for my bridesmaids. It's really inexpensive ($12!!) and I love how mine turned out. The picture is of the ivory one I made for myself, but theirs will look similar. Could you make your own?
I think you should keep looking for a fake flower. It will hold up much better than a real one.
I have heard from my hairstylist that she prefers fake flowers simply because of wilting being an issue. Of course, we are also getting married in Florida in June. So I think it depends on the humidity and time of year you are getting married!
I wore real in my daughter's wedding in June and they never wilted at all. Mine were dendrobium orchids in white. My daughter also switched to real roses in her hair after removing her veil and hers held up great as well. I think it really depends on the flower you choose.
I used real flowers and it didn't wilt when I changed from my flower halo into the small white flowers! My ceremony was 5:30pm and the flowers were delivered 4:00pm~ i'd say they looked a tiny bit droopy around 12:00/1:00am~ and wilted the next day~
Try etsy seller Londonxox - she'll make one custom. One of my BM's ordered one from her that was gorgeous - flowers with lace and feathers!
il_430xN_128874922.jpg (35.5 KB, 24 downloads) 1 year old 
I could make you one if you want! It'd look like this, just red:
Sorry if it's huge! Here's the link to my etsy shop: http://ThoughtfullyDesigned.etsy.com
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I love the idea of changing my look for the reception by removing my veil and adding a flower to my hair.
I want the flower to be red, and I haven't seen a ton of red options on Etsy or other sites. Do you think a real flower would work? I don't want it to look wilted an hour into the reception...