Post # 1
Keep me entertained while I wait for my RSVPs.
Why do I have to track them down after the RSVP deadline to remind them? Why can’t I assume that everyone who doesn’t RSVP just isn’t coming.
I still have some time before my RSVPs are due but why do people wait to the last minute or have to be reminded? When I receive the STD I know whether I want to go or not. So when the invitation comes, I am only waiting to make my official travel plans if needed. I don’t want until the last minute to see if something better comes along. If I have other plans, I decline.
I would have expected the majority of our married friends to get them back to us relatively quickly knowing that they went through the same thing when they were married.
So what are reasons why people don’t RSVP, forget to RSVP, wait until the last minute, and/or need to be called?
Post # 3
1. They forget
2. They lose the invite
3. They procrastinate, and are then embarrassed to tell you
4. They have somewhere else they’d rather be, and don’t want to tell you
5. They are holding out, waiting to see if they have somewhere better to be (I had someone tell me this TO MY FACE when I asked about their rsvp!)
6. They are hoping to find a +1, even though they don’t have one right now, and even though they have a group of friends coming to your wedding they wil know (Had someone else tell me this, too)
7. They think they’ve already sent it
8. Their invite got lost in the mail (or they lost it, and claim it did, who knows?)
Post # 4
@MsBlackberry: +1 and I also have to add I had a job that will just throw mandatory OT on the weekends a week before! I didn’t know if I was going to SIL’s wedding until a week before but the way she had her RSVP setup was only call if you weren’t going to make it. She was only having light apps and drinks, something small anyways.
Post # 5
I ran into a lot of friends who said they were coming early on, but then had stuff come up ( all out of town and military friends) who were sad they couldn’t come and put off telling me to protect my feelings. By that point though, i was bummed but not devastated, and understood.
Post # 6
They just don’t care enough or respect u enough to send it back.
Post # 7
@MsBlackberry: +1 especially to #5. I think a lot of people hold off becuase even a month in advance is too soon for them to decide.
I usually know right away when I get the invite whether or not I can or want to go.
Post # 8
BOTH entire extended families decided they didn’t need to RSVP, because clearly I should have somehow magically guessed they were all able to attend.
Post # 9
Most of my guests who haven’t sent one in offer no excuse, or say they keep forgetting.
It’s soo frustrating!
Post # 10
This drove me insane – it couldnt be any easier to RSVP to a wedding. People just dont think of the hassel and deadlines. And some people dont like making commitments.
Post # 11
We always send back RSVPs… except the one time when they didn’t provide a stamp. I didn’t have any stamps, so I intended to stop by the post office every day at lunch and every day I forgot. One day, I realized it was due THAT day so I sent an e-mail to the bride to let her know we were coming and was honest that I literally could NOT remember to go an buy a stamp.
Post # 12
@ajillity81: Uh. This would/will drive me bonkers.
Is one of the reasons that some people think that you know they will be coming? Because I know a couple that had this happen to them. Some family member went up to the bride after she asked them and said “Oh…my RSVP is required? You actually had doubts that I wouldn’t come??”….*crickets* Don’t you wish you could read people’s minds??
Post # 13
I figured the most popular reason is because people procrastinate. So they either wait until the due date to actually send it (as opposed to sending it in enough time for it to get to you before the due date) or they end up forgetting because it’s thrown in a corner somewhere.
Post # 14
@ajillity81: I hear ya! It’s so annoying! At first our RSVP’s trickled in slowly but then the 2 weeks before the deadline they started pouring in. We did have to reach out to a handful of people numerous times which wasn’t fun. Why should the host contact the guest when you were sent a STD months prior and a formal invitation with a pre-paid stamp … I just don’t get it.
Post # 15
- Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI
I have heard from a lot of people about an upcoming cousin’s wedding that they figured a verbal RSVP to the MOB was good enough…one family member actually got upset about the MOB being “too demanding and mean” just because she kept telling them to mail back the card!
Post # 16
- They lose the invitation
- They don’t want to come but don’t want to tell you
- They aren’t sure if they’re able to yet
For a lot of the weddings I’ve been invited to, I wasn’t sure what my school/work (when I was employed) schedule was going to be like. I always tried to contact the bride/groom and let them know what was going on before the RSVP deadline.