Post # 1
Has this ever happened to you? How did you feel? Did it have any impact on your decision to attend?
I ask because my fiance and I are having a fairly short engagement. Our invitations are going out about 60 days after he proposed. For our own reasons, we weren’t able to give out a pre-invitation, heads-up type “hey, we’re engaged” phone call so I’m wondering if it’s considered bad etiquette to invite someone to your wedding if you failed to previously inform them that you are engaged.
Post # 3
I don’t expect to know when every single one of my family members or friends gets engaged. Wouldn’t have any impact of my decision to go.
Post # 4
- Wedding: August 2014 - South Bonson Pier & Community Centre
@Overjoyed: I think pre-facebook this happened a lot. Especially if it’s an in-town wedding, I’d be likely to go regardless. I would base my decision on attending on how I felt about the couple, not on whether or not they called me. Like, if I got an invitation without prior warning and was genuinely happy for them, I’d make an effort to go. I hope that response makes sense?
Post # 5
@_Adelaide_: perfect sense. Thanks! I think social media has really skewed people’s expectations/entitlements. I ran into a law school friend (we graduated 3 years ago and haven’t seen each other since) and mentioned that I’m getting married. She legit said “and you didn’t put it on FB?! Why not?? How am I just now hearing about this??” Actually, it’s very normal to me that one might not be among the first to know of the engagement of someone they haven’t seen in 3 years. (fyi, I’ve been engaged exactly a month)
Post # 6
I would be excited! My whole world found out via FB (except my parents/grandparents, and my FI asked permission, so my parents already knew!)
Post # 7
I think a wedding invitation is an engagement announcent in itself! being engaged means that you’ll get married, it isn’t a civil status on its own
Post # 8
Some of my cousins probably had no clue until the save the dates were sent. No big deal.
Post # 9
Not a big deal whatsoever.
The “news” may indeed be greated happily by some, and they’ll be thrilled at the prospect of going / you thought to invite them.
If my first Wedding (circa 1980s) RSVPs are any indication, don’t be surprised if with the RSVPs come some Notes of Congratulations, heartfelt messages
“Great news to hear you and Mr Overjoyed are getting married… happy to say YES we will be there on your BIG DAY. CONGRATULATIONS !! “
Post # 10
This just happened to me today with my little brother’s best friend, I practically feel like he’s my little brother…and I’m going to be honest my reaction was a shocked/not happy sounding, “WHAT?! I didn’t even know they were engaged! Seriously??” However, in my situation (here comes a vent but I literally just found out and need to get this out) the couple will have been dating for less than 5 months at the time of the wedding, have barely communicated with eachother during that 5 months because he’s newly enlisted in the miltary and doesn’t get many calls home and has only had one visit back home, and she always goes for guys who just joined the miltary and tries to push them into marriage so that she can move out of her parent’s place and quit her job since they’ll make more $$ once they’re married (she’s pretty much told me this so I’m not just making assumptions.) I’ve watched her do this same routine with two other guys I know, but this time she got this guy in an awful situation who just lost his parents and wants to feel he has a family again and AHHHH it’s just such a bad idea.
Assuming you are in a normal relationship where everyone isn’t thinking ‘OMG this is a terrible idea’ and you have informed your immediate family and close friends, then I’d be happy for you and don’t see the problem!