Post # 1
Our wedding is planned for January 7, 2012. My fiancee still wants to go through with the wedding although I will be just finishing up my chemo and will be completely hairless, not to mention not feeling all that attractive or well. If any of you ladies have experienced this situation please share how you kept it together to finish planning your wedding and what did you do about hair, makeup and weight loss and/or gain?
Thank you all in advance for your prayers and good wishes.
P.S. My fiancee says he is marrying me not my boobs or hair…
Post # 3
I haven’t been through this but I just wanted to stop in and say you are amazing!
Post # 4
I’m sorry to hear this. I can say, don’t put yourself under any added pressure. If you’re not going to be feeling well, you should focus on recovery and feeling better, and resume wedding plans once you’re well rested and well on the mend. I wish you the very best!
Post # 5
I wish you luck with everything. If your wedding is going to be large and involved, you might want to get a planner to help you. If you aren’t feeling well from your surgery or chemo, it will be hard to plan by yourself. You might want to look into Penguin Caps, I recently saw an article about them and how they can possibly stop hair loss from chemo.
Post # 6
I’m so sorry to hear this. I understand your FI’s thoughts and think they are incredibly sweet but I think you need to focus on yourself right now. If I were you I’d either just get married now in a tiny ceremony (maybe courthouse) with a “reception” sometime next year, or just wait after treatments and you’re feeling much better.
I wish you the best with your treatment.
Post # 7
@imara56: First, I’m sorry to hear about your recent diagnosis. Keep your chin up and think positive thoughts. YOU can beat it!!! Second, I think you should do what you’re most comfortable with. I’m sure you’ve dreamt of looking and feeling like a princess on your big day, so if you’re concerned that this may not be the case maybe you should delay it a bit. I would hope that your vendors would allow you to reschedule without penalty. On the other hand, there is part of me that thinks that you should just marry as planned. Why wait to be married to your prince charming? There are plenty of fabulous wigs or scarves/veils that you could wear. Another option would be to have a small ceremony with close friends and family, then have a big reception at a later date. It would be a celebration of love and good health! Such a big decision to make, but I’m sure you’ll choose what’s right for you!
P.S. My MOH is a breast cancer survivor and I also have another friend who has recently beat breast cancer. I think that my MOH would’ve just done it, whereas my friend would’ve wanted to delay it.
Post # 8
You will be a beautful bride! God bless and be strong!
Post # 9
Your hair will grow back even more beautiful than before 🙂
If marriage is important for you, do it now and don’t wait! Make the most out of everything.
All of my grandmothers, aunts and some cousins/friends and many other females in my family went through chemo for breast cancer and the comeback is quick and amazing. You can always wear a wig, if your selfconcious of you hair, but from what I’ve noticed, is that your hair does thin out but It doesn’t necessarily all fall out to baldness (perhaps it depends on how aggressive the treatment and progression of your cancer is). Get a cut shorter cut if you have long hair now, so it’s not as drastic
May I ask your age?
Post # 10
Thank you all for your comments. I am 54 and have no history of breast cancer in my family. I want my wedding to my wonderful and supportive man, but just feel so overwhelmed I can’t even think. My wedding will be a yacht dinner cruise of 20 people so it’s all family and close friends. I’m just hoping I will be well enough to enjoy it.
May all your weddings be wonderful.
Post # 11
@imara56: Thinking of you and wondering how your decision-making process is going.
Post # 12
My mother and (would be) MIL had cancer, and both of their Chemo/Radiation places had hair and makeup people who helped people going through chemo/rad. So I would def approch those places.
Prayers are to you and your family.
And your FI is better than my (wouldbe) MIL. Her hubs left her when she got diagnosed with BC. Said that all she had going for her was her looks and she didn’t even have that. He’s a good man, he’s blessed to have you and you him.
May your wedding day be beautiful, full of love and happiness and support from your family and his!
Post # 13
I have not been through this situation but I just wanted to drop in and offer my support.
I wish you all the best luck and hope for a speedy recovery.
Post # 14
I’m so sorry to hear this. Your man is right, he is marrying all of you! I am sending my prayers.
Post # 15
I’ve not been through this situation either. Best of Luck to you and your family.
Do what you feel best in doing and let us know if we can be of any help!
Post # 16
my thoughts are with you, my mom had breast cancer twice. once when i was a little kids, and once three years ago. i think that comment that your FI made about not marrying your hair or boobs is so incredibly sweet! good job on finding a great man 🙂
i think that right now you must be so emotional that deciding whether or not to still hold your wedding, might be a bit too early to even think about. i think you might want to see how you feel after chemo/radiation, and then make a more informed choice.
i’m saying because my mom’s first time getting breast cancer she was reacting extremely well to the treatments, like nothing ever happened, honestly! but the second around wasn’t that easy and she had most if not all the side effects of the treatments. so you never know how you will feel about planning a wedding while undergoing treatment. but on the other hand having soemthing to look forward to might give more strength and make you happy, and those are such powerful and important emotions!
i think since it’s an intimate wedding you may feel more comfortable, because you are with close friends and familly.
as far as the hair, i mean wigs are always available and some wigs my mom had were wonderful looking!! she bought them and then went to her hairdresser so that he could frame it more to her face,and she looked amazing!
take your time and see how you feel, the answer will come to you when the time is right. keep in mind that chemo can sometimes affect your mood quite strongly (i swear my mom was bipolar for a while when she was on chemo) so one day you may want it, and the next you may not.