(Closed) Reception dilemma, religious issues… help :(

posted 6 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

They are adults, they can handle being around food and fasting. They are probably happy to have a chance to catch up with the other guests and chat, that’s why many people like attending weddings! I wouldn’t worry so much, if they say they are fine, they are fine with it!

Post # 4
Member
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Is there ANY way you can change your date?  Otherwise, I’d see what could make them more comfortable at the wedding.  I agree with Kerensa that they are adults.  Also, it might make them feel more spiritual to abstain during such an event…maybe?  

The only thing I am thinking is about other guests.  Will they constantly questions these two about their not eating?  Can they drink water at all or is it nothing?  

Post # 7
Member
1622 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I can understand your concern, but given that you can’t change the date and given that these 2 people have said they would like to attend, I think you have to put your own concerns aside.  They are adults and I’m sure they are capable of making good decisions for themselves. Enjoy your day and let them enjoy it with you.  Perhaps with such a small group it will create an opportunity for discussion with your FI’s family about Islamic faith practices? (silver lining?)

Post # 8
Member
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Maybe since part of your family is Muslim you could mention that it is Ramadan.  Wiki tells me that Muslims fast during this time to “teach Muslims about patience, spirituality, humility and submissiveness to God”…could you work that into some part of your reception?  Is that too much religion for you?


I also thought this was cool: since the Islamic calendar is different from the Georgian (the one we all use), in 34 years’ time a Muslim who fasts during Ramadan will have fasted on every day of the year.  

Post # 9
Member
2820 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Relax. Breathe! They said multiple times that it’s OK, and at some point you just have to believe them.

FWIW, your wedding sounds amazing. I will totally eat their meal, LOL!

Post # 11
Member
1026 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Could you offer a prayer or greeting when everyone arrives at the reception.  Something that thanks everyone for attending, mentions the fasting and how honored you are that they chose to join you during this special time.  It would probably eliminate the questions from other guests.  You could always have a small gift for this couple to give them after the reception- something with a note about how you appreciate them coming, and are sorry they couldn’t enjoy the food but hope they will enjoy the gift.  

I think everything will be ok- your wedding sounds wonderful!

Post # 12
Member
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

@MissMinette:  I worked with a few Muslim women who fasted during Ramadan and they always wanted everyone to know that they were fasting just so they wouldn’t be asked why they weren’t eating.  UGH.  I felt so bad for them…like being Muslim isn’t hard enough in this country, they have to deal with annoying questions, too.  I think if you mention it tactfully you’ll be fine.

 

You are getting married so soon!!  =)  

Post # 14
Member
1765 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

If they said it’s alright, you should believe them. I found out my shower is during Ramadan.. and my best friend is Muslim. She won’t be able to eat anything.. and we’re having sooo much food. She told me not to worry about it. I’m letting her choose foods ahead of time to be packed up & sent home with her. I don’t know if that’s something you can do in your situation, but it made me feel better to know I can send some food with her to eat later on after sunset. 

Post # 16
Member
3886 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

These folks have been Muslim for most if not all their lives; it’s not their first Ramadan, nor the first social event they’ve attended for Ramadan. Trust them when they say it’s okay! And perhaps consider mixing your seating chart a bit so that Muslims and non-Muslims are seated with one another, instead of “bride’s side, groom’s side” so they can talk socially and ask questions instead of gossiping.

You might also see if the restaurant would do a fancy picnic basket or other upscale take-away so that the couple will have nice food at hand when they can break their fast.

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