Post # 1
I am a newly engaged happy happy girl and I have a major concern about my reception! The wedding won’t be for another 10 months, but this keeps coming up time and time again!
I come from a family and have lots of friends that don’t drink and are uncomfortable with others drinking around them. Most of them are life long friends that I adore and want them to share my extra special day with me. However, I would also like to be able to serve wine or beer at my reception. Here are some option we were thinking about and I would LOVE some feedback about how to make this all right!
1. Do a morning wedding complete with a served breakfast (which breakfast is a HUGE fav of me and the man so this would fit us completely!) Invite all of our close family and my good friends that are uncomfy when it comes to booze. Because we would have the venue all day we would then do an appetizer/ wine and beer bar in the evening complete with dancing etc. We would be sending two different invites out
2. Don’t do beer or wine at all and invite everyone to an evening appetizer and candy buffet extravaganza. One invite
3. Do two receptions on two different nights. One at the church and one some where else. No Booze at the church and booze at the other recption. The good part about doing this is that the reception at the church would be free except the food! Tables, chairs, linens all covered. However where do we do the actual wedding? (His family is kinda uncomfy in churchy types situations)
4. No booze at the recpetion, but then find a bar that is seperate from the actual venue and rent it
5. Do just beer and wine and invite everyone (this is the one I like the least)
I just don’t know how to do this and please everyone (including the bride and groom) as well as stay inside my budget! I’m just not sure that wine and beer are worth this much hassel! This is one of the big reasons why I haven’t booked our venue yet!
Oh help help!! 🙂
Thanks so much
Post # 3
#1 – Makes no sense because the people coming at night wouldn’t see you married! Plus night invites would be confused that morning invites had already been there for so long, morning invites would be offended that their invite ends at a time when others are being invited to stay later. Plus 2 sets of invites/RSVPs would be a nightmare.
#2 – If you’re doing a late night event (which it would have to be if you’re not serving an actual meal) not having booze would seem a bit odd, I think guests would expect it.
#3 – I wouldn’t, like #1 this sounds incredibly complicated and like a ton of extra work and money.
#4 – I don’t get it…like two different buildings? Huh?
#5 – Seems like the easiest option, if people don’t want to drink that’s fine but I don’t understand why the person next to them having beer or wine should offend them, not like it’s hard liquor, they serve wine in church for goodness sake.
What if you picked a venue that had an indoor and outdoor area? Then you could put a bar outside so people could hang out there and drink then come back in to dance, and the non-drinkers could stay inside with the dance floor and stuff? Although I still prefer #5.
Post # 4
In my area it is really common to have a small family wedding like in a back yard and then invite several guests for the actual reception, but not the wedding. I know it sounds kinda weird when you look at other areas, but I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve just been to the reception and not the wedding. The bride and groom wear their dress and tux during the reception, and change into something different as they leave the venue. I guess what I am saying is that seperate wedding and receptions are common place and we like the idea!
I know it’s not for everyone 🙂
Post # 5
All of those but #5 seem very confusing. I think that it would actually create more problems because you’ll be inviting some people to certain parts of the event and others to different parts. That might lead to people getting offended and hurt feelings.
Are you planning to drink? If so, I think you should just have one event and offer beer and wine. Unless you are inviting people who have real drinking problems and can’t be around it, I don’t see why anyone should be that offended by the presence of alcohol. (And if they are, it’s YOUR wedding, not theirs. They can suck it up for your day.) Do they avoid restaurants and other public places just because there is alcohol there? Isn’t this the same kind of situation? Is the issue more about being around very drunk people than the drinking itself? If that’s the case maybe you could limit the number of drinks per guest. Or just have a cocktail hour or limit the amount of time you are serving drinks? That way, some people get to drink if they want, but they will be limited so they can’t get completely intoxicated and obnoxious if that is the fear of your other guests.
If you and your Fiance don’t drink, I think it’s perfectly acceptable to have a dry wedding. Remember it’s your wedding, and while it’s important to consider your guests’ experience, you can’t make everyone happy so you have to do what is best for the majority and for you.
Post # 6
It seems to me that your best choice, since it’s the one you like best, is going to be just doing a wine and beer only reception. I don’t drink really at all but I don’t think I’d be offended if the person sitting next to me was drinking.
What I would do is keep the alcohol choices limited and offer some fun nonalcoholic drinks to your guests who choose not to imbibe.
Post # 7
i dont drink so at the min we would provide beer and wine for guests but if it was me i would also add a few signature mocktails (non alcoholic margarita or lemonade are my favs) on display (i have a big glass drink dispenser im always using at get togethers)
Post # 8
I love the idea having a limited cocktail time as well as having beer and wine, but really playing up the non-alcoholic drinks.. OR having a dry wedding and just having lots of fun mocktail options in super fancy glasses….
You know how you have ideas in your head and then become a bit obsessive and can’t think out side of the box? This is deff where I was!
You guys are amazing!!!!