Post # 1
FI and I have two traditional registries at national stores. But we’re having problems coming up with enough things on the registry, even with registering for new things. We’ve lived together for two years (with the wedding another year and change away) and were established adults before moving in together. I know that some of the things that are worn now, might need to be replaced by wedding time. We’ve also registered for a full set of fine china (12 settings), new pots and pans, and new every-day dishes. Even with all of that, we’re only at 175 individual gifts.
The problem? We’re having 2 engagement parties, 2-3 bridal/wedding showers, and a wedding with approximately 260 invites and an estimated 230 attendees. I don’t need or expect gifts from everyone or at every event but very website I’ve found says you should have 2 (sometimes 3) times the items as the number of people coming and I’m not even close to the number of people coming to the wedding.
I know some people will give money and some will give gift cards if the registries are completed but do I need to make a serious effort to add more things to the registries? If so, Bees, how did you add volume to your registries?
Post # 3
@beeintraining: I would leave it be. Just because you have that many people and parties does not mean that you need 500 new shiny objects in your house for the purpose of etiquette. People will give gift cards and money or their own thoughtful gifts if there’s nothing on the registry to interest them. Stop before your house consumes you with all the junk you register for that you don’t really want 😉
Post # 4
I agree–Leave it as is. Most people give money!
Post # 5
@beeintraining: Leave it. We have only 1 registry and it says we’ve only got half of what we should. But the issue is that we’ve both been out on our own for years so we don’t need much. We registered for some replacement items (new towels and glasses/dishes) but that’s pretty much it. I’m not going to add random things to it just to satifsy the website – we’ll end up with stuff that we won’t use and just have to find a place for.
Macy’s, where we are registered, has a Dream Fund that automatically goes on your registry so people can contribute there towards other purchases at the store – for something that was expensive and you didn’t get, or something you didn’t even register for. But honestly, most people I know give cash as gifts now so I don’t know how many people will even use the registry.
Post # 6
@beeintraining: Definitely leave as is- agreed with pps that most will gift money.
Post # 7
Just leave it. We have 150 guests and I only registered for about 35 things. I didn’t want to just pick things for the sake of having more. We just don’t need it!
Post # 8
@beeintraining: No, do not make an effort to add things that you dont’ need. Leave the registries with only things that you do need and will appreciate owning and using (not feel burdened by).
Other than that I’m sure people will get you gift cards and cash. They’ll likely get you a few things from off the registry too, but it’s likely they’ll give you gift reciepts and you can exchange if you don’t need the item.
Post # 9
We are doing one “traditional” registry (maybe two) and then we are also doing a honeymoon registry so that’s something you could look into 🙂
I know for us we are in a similar boat ( well the opposite kind of) – we just built a new house and moved in together but we needed EVERYTHING so we just bought all new stuff. So we don’t need a lot of things which made it hard to think of registry items but we are poor now (new house and wedding in one year what WERE we thinking) so for us the honeymoon registry was a GREAT idea because we might not get one otherwise!
Post # 10
@beeintraining: No, don’t register for anything you don’t want or need just to fill up your registry. Also, keep in mind that even if you think you’ll have 230 attendees, if you’re giving singles a plus one, you’ll have a max of 115 social units.
Sure, you have your parties on top of that number, but if the gifts run out, you’ll get cash. No problem.
Post # 11
@Pinkmoon: Now I feel like a registry glutton. LOL. We’re inviting 175 and expecting 140-150 and registered for ~100 items. But, I just counted and 63 of them are under $25.
Post # 12
I’d just leave it be for now. I don’t htink you really need 2-3 times as many gifts as guests. A lot of people don’t bring gifts to engagement parties and give cash at the wedding, so it’s not as many gifts as you might think.
As you go along with your life try to pay attention if you think “Man, I really wish we had a ___” and you can always add things on. There was lots of stuff I didn’t think of until later (didn’t think of camping equipment until it turned warm and then I was like – duh – we need a tent!). You can also watch the registries and to see if they get super low.
Post # 13
@DomesticDiva: Hey if you need stuff, why not register for it! But we lived separately for several years in university and have lived in our house together for almost 3 years, so we need nothing. We even have 2 of some things!
Post # 14
@beeintraining: leave it. I think the whole “register for two gifts for each guest” thing is crazy! Register for things you need. If it runs out people will give cash.
Post # 15
Thanks everyone. That was what I was thinking — that there is no way people with 400 person weddings register for 800-1,200 items.
Post # 16
@beeintraining: My husband and I had a similar problem with the guest-to-gift-registry ratio. We also lived together first, so we had everything we basically needed.
You can add your two registrys to GiftRegistry360.com, which will synch the two and make them accessible online. What is super cool about this site is that you can register for anything anywhere on the web, including gift cards. We registered for gift cards to specific restaurants in our area, fun classes, fancy movie theaters, concerts, things like that. Instead of just “things,” we also got a slew of things to do as newlyweds!
Best of luck!!