- 9 years ago
- Wedding: January 2010
I need your emotional support. My friend is beginning to make me regret inviting her to my wedding, and I feel like a jerk for feel that way.
My Fi and I decided we are going to have a small ceremony at city hall and a nice lunch reception. We’ve narrowed down the location to three. The ceremony and lunch reception would be for immediate family only. Then we were going to have an “after party”/ “after work drinks” with all our friends—just one big open invitation to everyone we know—in the hotel we will stay at for our brief mini-honeymoon.
Part of this planning was because we didn’t want a big wedding. Also we had a big life change where my boyfriend had to relocate for work, and we had so many plans and decisions to make in one month. He’s actually currently in Denver, while I’m still in NYC area. It’s a complicated story that I don’t want to bore you all with. But in the end, my Fi and I planned a lot of it together and we were really excited about it.
We haven’t made the big announcement to our family yet, because my Fi wants to do it after he gives me my ring (sometime in October). So we haven’t really told many people.
Last night however, I told a long time friend. She and I were really close, like sisters. We love each other like sisters, but the last two years we’ve been grwoing apart. We’re just very different and the age difference between us is ten years (she has chihldren and a house, etc.)
Well, I told her about our wedding and she was very excited. She said she wants to come to the ceremony, etc. and I felt really bad because I told her, “Well, we decided to make it immediate family only…” but I felt so bad that I said I’m sure my Fi would be okay with it.
Well, my Fi was not mad. But it wasn’t what we planned. And this morning I wake up to all these e-maisl from her about a bridal shower, and registering at stores, etc. which my Fi and I really don’t want to do, because it begins to open up a can of worms with people we can and cannot include. We don’t think it’s right to register for stuff and send it to our friends when we’re not having thtem for a reception. etc, And I still have my mom and my aunt to think about and figuring out how they can be involved.
She’s kind of pushy, which is good soemtimes, but it’s making me upset. She really doesn’t undersetand that we are not doing the traditional thing and we’re happy with our own path. I kind of regret letting her know about our plans and feel like a jerk for it.
Have any of you regretted inviting a friend or felt like someone was taking over your plans?
What did you do?
I’d love to hear your stories for some inspiration.