Rehearsal Dinner Dillema

posted 2 years ago in Money
Post # 2
Member
6030 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

While traditionally the groom’ss family pays, that tradition is quickly dying. You can’t force the groom’s mother to pay, nor can you guilt her into it. Nor can you get bitter and resentful when she doesn’t open up her wallet. Your party = you pay. Be grateful that your parents are able and willing to be generous with their gift to you, but do not assume that they were under any obligation to pay for your wedding.

if you can’t afford a rehearsal dinner then don’t have one.

Post # 3
Member
42510 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

amanda.krafft:  If you have a rehearsal that requires the presence of your wedding party on a separate day, it is courteous to host them at dinner.

If the groom’s family doesn’t host, by default it’s up to the two of you. Given that your parents are paying for the vast majority of the wedding expenss, I am sure that you and your FI can host a simple dinner at your home or beer and pizza at the bowling alley.

Post # 4
Member
2690 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I paid for the rehearsal dinner.  I spent arond $100 and my mom and stepdad cooked.  We had over 40 people (bridal party, their kids, kids in the wedding, he officiant, and my oot family).  i NEVER expected my il’s to pay for that.  

Just to add, I also paid for the wedding…. I got a little help here but it was my wedding (well, our wedding) and I wanted what I wanted so I paid for it.  

I think pizza and drinks are just fine for the RD.  Nothing big or fancy and it will be more relaxerd at home anyway… we had ours at home and it was a blast.

Post # 5
Member
1715 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

Well really no one has to/should pay for the rehersal dinner.  It’s essentially a party for you and you should be the one to throw it.  IF someone offers to pay for it then that’s great and accept it but don’t go asking for anyone to pay for something you want.  If you do have a rehersal where the bridal party has to come together to practice and/or set stuff up then you should offer them dinner that works for your budget, whether it be pizza, a barbeque, etc.  If they you don’t need to see the bridal party the day before the wedding then just forgo the dinner and have a nice evening with your FI.

Post # 6
Member
6506 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Her financial status isn’t ‘putting you in a tight spot’ unless you are giving her money. You shouldn’t have expected someone else to pick up the bill and should have put this into your budget.

You asked who should pay: your parents said no, his mom can’t afford to so that leaves a pretty clear answer of who will be paying. You and your FI are the only ones who should be expected to pay anyways unless someone else graciously offers to host. Host what you can afford- pizza is just fine for a rehearsal dinner.

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