Post # 1
Ok, last September when we booked our venue we knew for certain we wanted something in October so we can enjoy the fall foliage during our outdoor ceremony, so we were set on October 2011 for our wedding. The venue didn’t have any Saturdays available, so we had to have a Friday wedding. This is all fine, but it presents a few problems for our rehearsal dinner planning. First off, the venue is about an hour and fifteen minute drive from where we live, which is also where most of our family & bridal party live. So to ask them to come for a Thursday rehearsal wouldn’t be so bad if we could have it later, say around 6:30PM…that would allow our bridal party to get out of work on Thursday, get ready and make the hour long drive. Well, the venue emailed us a few wks ago to tell us that the place was having an event the Thursday before, and the latest we could rehearse there would be 4pm. So I don’t want to ask my bridal party to take off from work Thursday (or leave early) because they will already be taking off Friday for our wedding day. Plus, rehearsing and dinner all before 4 seems too early to me.
One of my bridesmaids is from out of state, so to have it on Wednesday would make it impossible for her to attend.
Having it the day of will be tough, because we are all booked up with appointments, etc. There will be 7 on each side, no children though. Just the groomsmen standing up by the groom, and my BM’s walking down the aisle one by one until I walk down with my father. There will not be any readings either.
I feel like I can maybe do without a rehearsal, but just have our bridal party have a nice dinner the night before at our home or a restaurant in our town to say thanks to them. The officiant we chose said we most definitely should have a full rehearsal since there are so many of us though.
What should I do?
Post # 3
I would definitely recommend having a rehearsal. I think your best option is to have the rehearsal on Wednesday. For your OOT BM who can’t make it, one of the other BMs can update her on the details.
Post # 4
As long as you know what the venue looks like/ where things will be set up for the ceremony, you could maybe have a rehearsal somewhere else later on Thursday just so everyone can run through what will happen. Everyone will have to imagine what it will be like at the actual venue, but at least everyone will know their place relative to everyone else in the wedding party, and you can explain what the actual venue is like.
Post # 5
I agree with missjo117, having a rehearsal is really important. Not as much for the bridal party, but for the bride and groom. Going through all of the motions, helps release some anxiety the next day. I think for one BM to miss the rehearsal isn’t a huge deal. The other girls can fill her in. I would go for Wednesday evening!
Post # 6
Could you possibly do it the weekend before?
.. edit: nm. i just remembered the OOT bm. 🙁
Post # 7
I would be looking for an alternate venue for the rehearsal to be held on the Thursday just prior to your rehearsal dinner. The rehearsal itself could be held in a restaurant that has a private room, a church or school hall etc.
If you can find somewhere local, it would save the hour plus drive to your venue.
As long as the fficiant is familar with your wedding venue, he/she can guide you through the layout of the facility.
It is the logistics of the ceremony that are important to practice.
Post # 8
Thanks for the suggestions everyone – I am looking into doing it Wednesday, and my OOT bm will just have to deal with it. Come to think of it, she hasn’t replied to a single email, text or call in the last 3 wks so who knows if she’s even going to make it until October.