Post # 1
So one of my bridesmaids booked the venue for the rehersal. This is not necessarily a bad thing. But it is not the venue my fiance and I had picked, not a venue that anyone else has seen, and she didn’t ask me first. She booked the place, then told her mother, who told her son (my fiance) who told me. I don’t think it is unreasonable for the bride to be involved in picking the venue for the rehersal. To be clear, not the rehersal dinner, the actual wedding rehersal.
This ticked me off. Apparently I should be happy and grateful she did this for me? My fiance is now pissed off at me for my first reaction being “Why would she book a place we have never seen without asking one of us first?” I do not understand how in any realm this is not a WTH instance. I mean, it is one less thing for me to do, and if the venue works then it works and I’m not all that angry. However, now I have to figure out if it will work, how to get there, and what type of food and things are near by for the rehersal dinner.
I’m not really sure how to respond to this situation. I mean I know I will say thank you when I see her, being a gracious bride and all that. But if I can’t be WTF with my fiance, then I just hav ethe lovely weddingbees.
Post # 3
Wow, WTF? This is your wedding, not hers. I think you should just be blunt. Call her and say you heard something about rehearsal spaces and want to clarify what exactly is going on (maybe something was miscommunicated?) If not, tell her you want to look into the options for rehearsal spaces and are not ready to commit to one. You appreciate the help and would be happy to look at the venue with her, but would prefer that she let the venue know it is not definite.
Post # 4
I dont understand this entirely, you are having a wedding rehearsal AND a rehearsal dinner at seperate locations? And this BM booked the wedding rehearsal venue without telling you? I always thought you rehearse the wedding at the actual venue where the wedding is held so everyone knows where to stand and all that…
Post # 5
If neither you nor your FI asked her to do this, then she has for some reason crossed the line.
I would speak with her to find out how this happened? Was there some sort of communication breakdown that led her to believe she was to do this?
I would ask to see the venue and let her know that if it doesn’t work for you and your FI that you would be booking elsewhere.
Post # 6
My venie wants to charge a ton of money for a rehersal. So we are having a rehersal someplace else. The rehersal dinner was going to be a bar be que near my Fiance’s parents house, there is this large room, with lots of space with grills and things outside. Everyone had talked and looked at this place. Fiance’s sister went and booked another place without asking anyone, and didn’t even let me know. She told other people and it trickled back to me.
Post # 7
It’s really odd, but I’m not sure how much of a big deal it is. Maybe she was just trying to be helpful and figured it fell to your FILs to decide since it’s close to the RD? Unless she’s usually malicious, it sounds like just a communication error.
Post # 8
I’m not all that upset with her. I mean we are having a relaxed bar be que rehersal, that can work almost anywhere. I’m just confused by why she didn’t call or text me.
I am upset with my fiance, he seriously started yelling at me saying I was being ridiculous and ungrateful, worse than ungrateful hostile. And I was like “all I did was say it was weird?” I mean, her planning hte bachlorette party? Sure, of course she did. Her booking a place, not the place we planned, for the rehersal dinner and not tell me? Umm, What?
Post # 9
Umm, you are not being ungrateful, it is totally not in the bridesmaids’ job description to book the rehearsal location and this is totally weird. Why don’t you just change it? Cancel what she did (I doubt she paid for it?) and book whatever you want!
Post # 10
Yea, that does seem weird. Did you put her in charge of booking the rehearsal venue? Regardless of whether she booked the right one, was it even her job? If not, and you hate the place then just book another one yourself… because you didn’t ask for help. But it seems to me that you can rehearse anywhere if it’s not at your wedding venue, especially since you won’t be spending tons of time there.
Post # 11
She is not in charge of it, no one asked her to, and if the place she booked works then great! I know vents are usually hurt/ angry / sad but I am honestly just severely confused. If someone who is not at all involved in your rehersal planning, they are just expected tos how up, randomly starts booking things for it, it’s normal to be confused, right?
Post # 12
I don’t understand…why is anyone booking a separate space for the rehearsal itself? Shouldn’t that be at your ceremony venue?