Post # 1
Remember this: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/i-dont-care-if-my-baby-is-invited-im-bringing-her#axzz2h428FmVY Summary: My uncle insisted he will bring his 6 month old baby to the wedding even though it’s a child-free event and was totally obnoxious about it. Then he insisted he wanted her to be the flower girl, I alreay had FI’s nieces. I didnt want another, especially one that doesnt walk. No wagons for me thank you, —especially because he wont let most of the family even SEE his baby!
1. He has made so many nasty coments about friends of my dad’s who he doesnt like, 2 of them are co-workers of his (and my dad’s employees) who my dad has known before they came to work with him, so over 20 years. Note, my dad is paying the wedding. My uncle is not.
2. He made a big stink about who he DOES want invited. A cousin of mine who is estranged from the family and who is a snob who talks a lot about “high society” who wouldnt even accept a friend request on FB (not a big deal, but if shes not interested in being friends on FB, doubt she’s interested in being there for the biggest day in my life)
3. He insisted I choose the mariachi he likes and told me so immediately after I announced the engagement. Mariachi is a big deal for my dad so he wanted to pick it. He originally had booked Mexico’s best Mariachi (Mariachi Vargas –amazing) but cancelled it bc has some business problems and realized it would be silly to spend on that. Since then he picked another mariachi who is also very good and who I have seen and liked! He texted me again today (wedding is in 3 weeks) to insist I choose his mariachi even after I told him we already booked one. Then he said “well you might want to check to make sure your dad didnt forget” Um okay, that’s just straight up insulting. We got this.
He just has a lot to say about the wedding and opinions on how he thinks it should be but doesnt offer them as opinions, more like “This is what you need to do”
Bees, please note that when he got married 6 years ago —-I wasn’t invited.
So fed up. I cannot “uninvite him” as many Bees suggested with the previous post. Any other ideas on how to handle this? I dont want to be offensive but really would appreciate it if he would butt out.
Post # 3
Just ignore him Honey. it is your wedding just smile and nod…..your uncle is annoying you know it….so there is nothing new here.
Post # 4
If he’s not contributing financially to the wedding in any way, he doesn’t get a say. I know it’s tricky to be firm and polite with family sometimes, but I would remind him that your dad is paying for the wedding and you’re happy to consider his “advice” or input, but you, FI, and your dad will be making the final call as it’s your wedding and your FI’s wedding, and your dad is financing it.
Post # 5
@HourThyme: Next time he annoys you, I would tacfully remind him you were not invited to his wedding and that frankly he should be thankful he is coming to yours. You respect his wedding wishes, he needs to do the same with his baby and attitude.
Post # 6
That poor, poor girl. He’s going to be a nightmare when she gets married.
Be sure to ignore/stand up to your uncle as much as possible. If you give in he might be just as awful to all you other cousins who are getting married.
Post # 7
Why isn’t your dad running interference here?
Post # 8
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
@HourThyme: Ignore, avoid, and ignore some more. If his texts or calls bother you, screen them and delete them without reading them. You only have to deal with it for a few more weeks.
Post # 9
@EffieTrinket: +1 What gives, OP?
Post # 10
How often do you see/talk to this uncle? Does he make these comments in person? On the phone? You mentioned one text message— is that how most of this is made?
How do you usually respond to these comments? Do you tell him it’s none of his business? Do you try to be polite? Do you ignore them and smile and nod?
Post # 11
Talk to your dad, draw the line.
Post # 12
I’m sorry that you’re going through this and that your uncle is being beyond difficult 🙁
Post # 13
Why dont you just tell him that since he apparently dislikes so many people close to you, he should stay home?
Post # 14
Talk to your dad and get it handled!!
Post # 15
I agree. Can you ask your dad to step in and deal with this whole thing? Tell your uncle you want to enjoy your wedding/the days leading up to it and cannot deal with hearing another comment from him again. I don’t think it’s rude at all to say something. I would have flipped out by now if I were you!
Post # 16
@EffieTrinket: @mrs_pudding_pop: @HappySky7: @Regan7312: @RedPandas:
I’ve told my dad all of this. He does not seem to care. Or does care but doesnt say anything. My dad is a pretty quiet guy.