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Renewal/reception months later?

posted 4 months ago in Reception
poll: Ceremony and reception conundrum:
Small ceremony with no reception. : (2 votes)

29 %

Small ceremony with vow renewal/big reception a few months to a year later. : (3 votes)

43 %

Have the ceremony and reception the same day even if it means waiting an extra year. : (2 votes)

29 %

7 votes

Member

112 posts

Blushing bee

MissTillie June 22, 2013 Asbury Park, NJ

So here's the thing... FH and I have been engaged since April and wanted to be married by next fall at the latest. Fast forward to January and not a single thing has panned out for us, wedding-wise. Our plans for venue, officiant, and entertainment have all fallen through for different reasons. It's so discouraging that right now we're thinking of just saying to heck with it and having an intimate backyard ceremony with close family and friends in the spring. One of our friends even offered to get ordained for the occasion.

Problem is, we both have huge families that would probably never forgive us if we didn't have some form of big reception that they could all attend. As of now the tentative plan is to have our little ceremony in May and a bigger ceremony/vow renewal with a full reception in 2013 when we have more time to plan and money to accomodate a larger number of guests.

On one hand I feel like this would give us the best of both worlds, but on the other hand I'm afraid its a little self indulgent to try and have it both ways. Should we do away with the small ceremony and push our real date to 2013 even though it kills us to wait so long, or should we keep both dates and have two seperate weddings (meaning a wedding and a renewal)? Anyone care to offer opibnions/advice?

4 months ago

Member

1,205 posts

Bumble bee

DaneLady August 25, 2012 Virginia

Well, you kinda can't have two weddings unless you get divorced or one of you dies... so it would be a vow renewal if you get married and have something else later down the road. I understand having huge families & high expectations. I told my parents (and he told his) that we are only going to be able to afford to host X number of people because we're paying for it ourselves. If they feel like more people must be included, they can offer to pay for them or we can refuse to include them. It's a hard line but we have been very tactful about it.

Oh, and even if you have a very small (like parents & siblings only) ceremony, it's still proper to host a reception- it is a thank you to the guests who shared your day- even if it's just a nice dinner out, finger foods & light appetizers, or cake and punch.

4 months ago

Member

2,985 posts

Sugar bee

Jenniphyr February 2, 2013 Alberta, Canada

I wouldn't do a vow renewal, but I think that a reception later on would be just fine. If you wanted, you could show a video of your original ceremony at the reception, or perhaps stream it live on the Web when it's performed.

4 months ago