Post # 1
Okay, none of this is anything you all haven’t heard before…<br /><br />I wish people would just RESPOND TO THEIR G*DD*MN RSVPs!!! Honestly. Our deadline was August 6th and we had several people not respond. Actually… probably about 30. I posted on facebook “hey everyone who got an invitation – our deadline was today! We have a little wiggle room and can still take later RSVPs, so if you forgot or didn’t get a chance to send it in, you can do so now or feel free to just send me a message on Facebook!”<br /><br />So I got several messages. A friend who has been away half the summer apologized and said she would be there, FI’s cousin who has been working all summer as a band instructor said “I’m so sorry, I forgot! We will be there!”, etc. I have no problem with these people. Actually, I have BEEN that person before that has forgotten to send in my RSVP! It happens.<br /><br />After I posted that there were some people we didn’t hear from. We messaged these people and I saw that they ALL saw my message which was just a very nice “hey! We didn’t get your RSVP, but I wanted to check and see if you are coming :)” and they SAW the message on Friday and/or Saturday and only one has responded. FACEBOOK TELLS ME THAT YOU SAW IT! If you still don’t know, make up your mind – now! I am really sorry, but we have to get numbers into our caterer!<br /><br />FI has two cousins that we haven’t heard from… we asked his aunt (who does weddings) to check with them when they were visiting her yesterday. I texted her last night and asked if she found out if they were coming. Nothing. And right before that she was texting me. Come on!! <br /><br />Seriously. I invited you to our wedding – obviously, I want you there if you can make it. But if you can’t make it just say so. Sure, I will be sorry to hear you can’t get make it… but just say so. Seriously, I’ll get over it.<br /><br />Why can’t people just respond? Can they not plan their schedules for two weeks ahead of time? One of these people not responding lives 12 hours away – I think she would know by now whether or not they are planning on taking a big trip in two weeks!
Post # 2
YogaFaerie: ugh i feel your pain! i was expecting my mailbox to be flooded with RSVPs and they’re SLOWLY trickling in..like what are you doing with them? You’re either coming or your not! ha…i’m guilty of holding onto RSVPs in the past too so I guess i’m not one to talk, but i never will ever again! right in the mail they go. so frustrating!
Post # 3
YogaFaerie: It is most definitely annoying when people do not return their rsvp’s in a timely manner.
I do suggest however, that you contact people individually, not via Facebook. Unless you have an separate Facebook group for those people invited to your wedding, it’s a little awkward for those “friends” who are not invited to your wedding to read a reminder posted to those who are.
Just phone or text the non-responders and tell them that if you don’t hear from them by _____, you will have to consider them a “no” and will miss them at the wedding.
Post # 4
- Wedding: April 2013 - Valparaiso, IN
I wouldn’t have put a status on you facebook telling people who were invited to the wedding to RSVP. Kinda rude. Used you’re planning on inviting all of your Facebook friends. I get that it’s frustrating. And it would be more time consuming. But call the people who haven’t RSVP’d yet.
Post # 5
I saw a facebook post from another bride tagging and calling out all the people who hadn’t RSVPed. I wanted to die of embarrassment. For Her. Sounds like you sent private messages (hopefully) but I would still recommend a text or phone call between you and each person. You can let them know your caterer needs a head count for meals and if you dont hear back you will have to assume they’re unable to attend.
Post # 6
I feel like while a small number of people simply forget the deadline, most people who aren’t RSVPing don’t plan to come and just feel awkward about / don’t know how to say no. Personally, I think you can send a single reminder to capture people who inadvertently forgot, but then just let it go. If people intend to come, then they will respond and if they’re not responding, then they don’t intend to come.
Post # 7
Yeah, my facebook is actually basically only people invited to the wedding – I don’t have too many friends on Facebook. And for asking people if they were coming – I sent them a private message, I didn’t post it publicly. We didn’t have phone numbers for those people or e-mail addresses which is why I sent facebook private messages. The people who we haven’t heard from whose phone numbers we DO have we called.
Post # 8
Our invites go out in 2 weeks, I’m so dreading this! I know there are alot of people who just won’t send in the RSVP and i’ll have to contact them.
Post # 9
And almost 50% of our declines were assumed declines :/ We didn’t hear from people and we just assumed they weren’t coming and felt pretty safe doing so. There is a small handful that we thought may have forgot, but I didn’t feel the need to PM them yet so that was the purpose of the status. So that they still have an opportunity to respond on their own before I hunt them down.
Post # 10
Oh, I so feel the frustration. My deadline was August 1st and I only had about half of the RSVPs in. When I contacted some individually a couple told me that they just assumed i knew they were coming. Ummmmm! How am I supposed to know that?! I swear last week, the week folllowing the RSVP deadline, I received more response cards than before! I set up an online RSVP system and include stamped and addressed envelopes thinking I was making it easier for everyone. I guess not!
I will say, if I ever receive another invitation, I am sending the RSVP back ASAP! lol
Post # 11
- Wedding: September 2014 - county fairgrounds
I have heard from 40 people out of 150, the deadline is September 1. And the 40 is including people like my maid of honor and mom whom I know will be there. I’m expecting a lot of them are going to send it at the last minute and I’m going to have to make a lot of phone calls and if I still don’t get an answer by “x” date I will just assume they aren’t coming…