Post # 1
Wondering if anyone else had to deal with response cards coming back with more people on it than invited? I recently started receiving some response cards (so exciting) and 1 read 2 adults and 2 kids. We only invited the 2 adults! Looking for suggestions on how to deal with this situation respectfully. The guests are on my Fiancee’s side.
Thanks for your help. I guess when people said the guest list was one of the most stressful parts of planning a wedding, they were RIGHT!!
Post # 2
Is it an adult reception only was that on the invite? I would call them and tell them that it’s adults only and apologize for the misunderstanding- (even though you shouldn’t have to apologize for it comes across more understanding/compassionate/friendly). That’s what I would do.
Post # 3
I would have your FI call and explain that the invite was extended to the adults and that he hopes they can still make it.
Post # 4
This happened to us. We ended up with 6 extra children that weren’t invited to our small wedding. We decided just to suck it up and not make waves. I think you are well within your rights to call and explain that you cannot accommodate extra guests, though. 🙂 The breach of etiquette is on them, not you.
Post # 5
Ugh, annoying! I invited a couple from FI’s side of the family (the wife is FI’s cousin), and she wrote a passive aggressive response on the reply card because I didn’t invite her kids. I would totally understand if they couldn’t go because they didn’t want to leave their kids at home with a sitter – just don’t be rude about it.
Post # 6
“There must have been some misunderstanding. We are not able to accomodate extra guests. If that means you are unable to attend the wedding, we wil miss you.”
Do not give any reason why you cannot accomodate extras. For some people, that is an automatic trigger for them to solve the rpoblem:
no room?- no problem, the children will sit on our laps
no budget?- no problem, we will pay for their plates
adult reception? – our children are very mature for their age.
Just stick to the basic mesage.
Post # 7
My response card confusion has been that people don’t understand they are supposed to indicate the number of guests and instead they just put a check mark so I’m hoping that applies only to the people indicated in the label as invited otherwise there might be a bunch of people we didn’t know were coming at our wedding
Post # 8
julies1949: I love that response, I know I will have to say something along those lines for my September wedding. Adults only but some ‘family’ doesn’t seem to be getting the message!!!
Post # 9
We had a friend of FI’s mother add her son and his gf to their RSVP. We had FMIL handle it and they decided they couldn’t come. We weren’t to disappointed.