Post # 1
Okay, this is kinda random, but it’s bothering me. I’m at work (yay for balckberries and playing on the internet at work!), and my coworkers are sitting around talking about REALLY raunchy stuff. The 17 year old is telling stories about him and his buddies doing all this stuff with girls, even tho he has a girlfriend, and saying “oh I’ve only had one train” (not clear on what that means, but definitely not asking). And my manager was talking about one chic at another store that had given head to all these guys at the company christmas party and stuff. Don’t get me wrong, I’m no virgin, I have piercings, and have done some really freaky stuff, but I just don’t feel comfortable with people just talking about it. Is this normal? Do people just sit around talking in fairly explicit detail about their sex lives, and other people’s sex lives? I was raised in church, so I was never exposed to it before, and it weirds me out! Even my FMIL was telling my FH’s youngest brother which online porn sites are the best. And the first time she met me she told us our headboard better not be banging louder than hers that night. O_o I’m an open person, but I prefer to know you a little before I open up too much.
Anyway, know this was kind of odd, but I’m feeling really confused!
Post # 3
Wow, both those scenarios are WAY out of line! That conversation at work is not even legal – it goes way beyond the line of sexual harassment. And your FMIL – that’s just gross!!!
Post # 4
ick! NO, I’m pretty sure that’s not normal!
Post # 5
Yeah, that’s not normal. I work in a store with some young’uns and they sometimes let their talk get out of hand… but they always quiet up when someone is clearly uncomfortable or when there’s a manager or someone "uncool" around.
The FMIL comment is very strange. I got uncomfortable when my FMIL was making fun of the newscaster for saying "servicing" instead of "serve" … and said what kind of sexual act servicing is. I can’t believe that, but it’s nowhere near as bad as what you’ve described!
Post # 6
I’m a pretty open so I don’t have a problem with explicite stuff like that but it is just NOT APPROPRIATE in the workplace. EVER.
Post # 7
- Wedding: September 2009 - Harbison Chapel & The Maple Lane Farm
I’m with these girls – That doesn’t sound normal to me. And your FMIL thing, that’s so wrong.
Post # 8
Yay, I’m not just over-reacting! Ya’ll made me feel a lot better. I’ve worked a lot of places where folks are open, but this is nuts! Earlier the 17 year old guy was reaching for the 30+ year old manager’s boobs, and made a comment along the lines of “I’m just cupping your boobs” to which she replied “Well would you want me to cup your balls?” It’s totally normal for my MoH, FH, and I to have a conversation along those lines, but at work? I guess I’ll just ignore tho, I’m only working here for the next 3 months, and once business picks up (going into prom/wedding season), there won’t be time to talk dirty.
As for my FMIL, she’s just crazy. Nice, but crazy. My FH used to get made fun of in middle school cause she sold sex toys. My FH was pretty screwed up by her unfortunately.
Post # 9
Um…if your FMIL used o sell sex toys…I wouldn’t be surprised if she mentioned sex…often…have you seen "Meet the Fockers?"
But at work…that’s SH (sexual harassment). The thing is, if you don’t speak up, then the next girl to fill your shoes will have to put up with it because they’ll all think it’s ok. Make it clear that it is NOT ok in front of you. You shouldn’t have to listen to it. (I’m no stranger to raunchy talk, I’m in the Navy for petes sake. But you have to draw a line where there is none so they know it’s not ok!!)
Post # 10
Ill. Is there a higher-up to the manager? Is this a national company you work for? The 17 year old is a minor and, depending on the state you live in, the manager can legally be considered in violation of Sexual Misconduct Involving a Minor.
That aside, MightySapphire is absolutely right about this being a case of SH. You probably don’t want to feel like a narc, but these discussions are completely unacceptable and you have the right to work in an environment free of sexual impropriety. What’s happening at your job is "Hostile Environment Sexual Harassment" due to the frequency of these discussions. Morality is not the issue here; bottom line, its illegal.