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Consider looking at bands, plain or eternity (with little diamonds all around). I think they are so simple and pretty, and if you can find one that is antique, even better! Solitaire's are expensive, and everyone else has one - take this as an oppurtunity to be unique! And if you want to add a solitaire later when you are out of school (maybe a 5th anniversary?), then you can add one and wear the band alongside it.
Also - just to get an idea of what you can afford if you do venture into the chain stores, go to www.bluenile.com and it will give you an idea of rings you can risk trying on. :o) BTW bluenile has great prices and I have heard alot of people praise them. Chain stores have a big mark up so just keep that in mind.
Would you consider a stone other than a diamond in your engagement ring? It would be really unique and could possibly save a bundle of cash.
I'm with smartl on this one. I have an emerald and I LOVE it. One of my girlfriends just got a sapphire and it's gorgeous. Have an open mind about your ring and you might be suprised at what you find. Also, would you consider a diamond alternative like moissanite?
I'm all for having an alternate stone. I origionally wanted a pearl, actually. However, BF really wants to get me a diamond. We've talked about it a lot, and this is one area he will not back down on. Part of me thinks its sweet, and part of me wants to smack him upside his head.
I'm not an expert on this one, as I left all the details to Mr. Tulip! But my impression is that mall stores are about the worst possible places to buy a diamond -- they'll overcharge you for low quality.
For a budget diamond, you actually do better at places like Costco and Wal-Mart. And definitely the Internet (Blue Nile, Bidz.com), though there's the downside that you can't see it in person.
Overall, your best bet is either to go with a different kind of stone, as some others have suggested, or go with a vintage ring (which I love because it has added history behind it). Either one is so much more unique than a plain old solitaire! And, if you find you have your heart set on a big diamond ring, there's always that option for a future anniversary, and you can wear your first ring alongside or on your right hand. Or you can get a cubic zirconia ring for now and replace it with a diamond later, and no one even has to know!!
What Tulip said! Mall stores offer low prices, but with low quality and a high markup to match. You guys can do much better by going into a midrange local jeweler and telling them honestly how much you can spend. They can work with you to help you get the most bang for your buck, and at the end you'll have an actual jeweler you can go back to in the future, rather than just a chain sotre! :-)
Love the idea of using a non-diamond stone, too. Settings for gemstones and diamonds can be very similar, and I love the idea of getting a ring with, say, a sapphire or ruby (they're good strong stones! Not too delicate) now and then in a few years you can switch it out for a diamond.
Have you and your DF talked about moissanite? That might be another route to consider :-)
I'd love to hear what you guys decide on!
What is it with boys who insist on buying a ring that *they* love when it's not what you want? YOU are the one that has to wear the ring for the rest of your life, not him - if you want an alternate stone, what's the problem? I would suggest voicing your opinion more strongly if you feel strongly about it. Besides, no matter where you go, you are only going to get a very very tiny diamond for $500.
(Sorry, sensitive subject for me. My fiance apparently bought me the ring "that he had always envisioned for his future wife since he was a kid." I guess he thought that was romantic, but it made me angry because he didn't even for one second consider what *I* might like to wear forever, but what he always liked since before he met me.)
hmm...I never thought about local jewelers over chains. The town our school is in is very small and there aren't many local jewelers around. Time to hit up google!
I don't mind having a small stone. Honestly, I actually prefer it. I'm not big on jewelry other than earrings, so something simple would be great.
Also, what is moissanite? I've never heard of it.
Here's a great site I found that explains moissanite
http://www.charlesandcolvard.com/learn_more.cfm#a1
It sounds good to me!
go to the store to try things on, as what you like from pictures and what you like on your finger differs a lot, surprisingly. almost everything i liked in photos looked pretty bad on my man hands. ;)
then go online and look for something similar as you'll get a lot better quality for much less cost. if you have a diamond or jewelry district in your area, go there for the best deals (but educate yourself, first, as they can be very shady). also try consignment stores, antique stores, etc.
pricescope.com has an overwhelming amount of info, but it was invaluable to us when we were shopping.
Lime, I was going to suggest the exact same thing: try on tons of styles (for metal alone you have white gold vs. yellow gold vs. platinum vs. palladium vs. rhodium plated white gold), solitaires, stones with sidestones, colored gemstones as the center stone, etc.
Joyful2, www.Pricescope.com is amazing for its wealth of research as well as a community of like-minded ppl with tons of applicable advice. Please, please, please take some time (hours!) to cruise that website.
You may want to check out Kohl's or some department stores, if you're not too picky about the stones. Kohl's also sells Moissanite. It is where I got my engagement ring, though my FI also gave me his grandmother's.
I would second the poster about pricescope.com it's a wonderful helpful and super knowledgeable forum. It will help you get the most for your money! Do not go to the mall jewelery stores other than to just try on styles-they will overcharge! Congratulations!
I know my FI talked our jeweler down in the price of the diamond. They quoted him something that was really marked up and he said something like, "No, I'm going to pay X for it," and they agreed. It was a smaller local place, as others have suggested. He used BlueNile to figure out what he wanted then shopped around accordingly.
I also thing engagement rings with stones other than diamonds are beautiful. FI also insisted he wanted to get me a diamond, but he got me a smaller channel-set band with sapphires as a "promise ring" last year.
Good luck and congrats!!
All of the advice you ladies have given is great! I haven't been on many jewelry sites except Blue Nile, but they have some beautiful diamonds at a great price, and a wealth of information so you can make and diamond-educated decision before you ever step foot in a jewelry store.
And I totally agree about most jewelry retail establishments...the markups are darn near highway robbery!
I'm from northern cali and we have this great place in the city where jewelry is sold at a wholesale price. We still have to get our rings and I've been referred there by many a bride!
And I agree that the ring you wear should be the one YOU want, not him. He gets his own ring so he should put all his selection energy in that! 
I still haven't gotten my e-ring yet because he's waiting for me to pick out what I want, so I'm gonna go shopping for it in a couple of weeks. This may not be the most romantic way to do it, but I would much rather he spend thousands of his hard earned cash on something I know I'll love than something he picks without my input.
We went to look at designs tonight, and BF was a little embarrased by how little he can afford. He would never admit it, but he is. Any ideas on how I can boost his ego? Also, are there any good websites? I tried to look at Kohls, but their site is down. Sadly, there aren't any diamond districts in the upstate of SC. We are visiting his family near Ashville next weekend. Anyone know of good places to look around the Ashville/Black Mountian area?
i can understand that. my fi was like that too. at least you know his heart is in the right place. does he feel weird talking to you about it? if not, i would just remind him that all material stuff in the world doesn't matter....it's all about you two. i'm not sure if you had a ring in mind that you wanted, but there's nothing wrong with getting matching bands for now so he doesn't feel overwhelmed. it's always a GREAT excuse to upgrade later!
i don't know if you're an ebay fan, but if you find a good reputable seller, you could really maximize your dollar there. plus there's so much selection you could even 'window shop!' i'm a big fan of ebay. they have all kinds of wedding stuff too. i haven't gotten dress shopping yet, but the one i've loved for a long time (from afar) is half price on ebay!
hmm...thanks littlefoot! We talked about it. He's pretty open about it with me, but I know he added some to his budget when the salesman asked cause he "didn't want to look cheap." I'll check out ebay and send him some links for inspiration.
i don't know if this has already been written but you should read miss peony's post on diamonds, it's really helpful and can help you get the most out of your money. :) i'd say a very beautiful band would be nice. there are a couple that i looked at randomly online that are super thin (but very elegant) that is a eternity style band (diamonds all around). you could use one as your e-ring and then another one as your wedding band. or like everyone else mentioned, a different stone. sapphires are extremely beautiful and comes in all sorts of colours ranging from pink to darkest blue and are super strong! it would be a great way to add sparkle and be different from the norm. best of luck to you :)
i know that lots of people have written about blue nile, but my fi bought my ring there and i love it. he said that the customer service was amazing - they really helped him a lot, and there is a pretty generous return policy, i believe. their website is pretty userfriendly. this might be good for your fi, since they have a LOT of diamonds in their stock, so it might be easier for you to find someting in the appropriate price range. my fi took a while after buying the ring to propose, and it was too big, and blue nile exchanged it with no problems, and they do rhodium plating for free. i don't know if all places do that, but they do. there was this fantastic article in the nyt recently: http://www.nytimes.com/2007/01/07/business/yourmoney/07nile.html?ei=5070&en=52554f86a0fdb8c2&ex=1189396800&adxnnl=1&adxnnlx=1189254050-0KaZwGNf3zZHiqAmxX3OgQ
that may be interesting. if you can't get to the article, just go to www.nytimes.com, and type in "blue nile jewelry" under the "search archive" box and it's the second hit. whew, sorry so long!
maybe he should just get a sense of the style you like and then go without you? that way, he can be more upfront with the salesperson about his actual budget. there's a ton of ego wrapped up in this for most men, so if you give him some guidelines (that you know would be within his price range), hopefully he and a salesperson can work together to come up with something beautiful.
Hey everyone! I just wanted to say thanks for all the wonderful advice you shared.
My mom has given my BF her ring to use however he sees fit. 
Yeah, it was a suprise to us both. We looked at it last night, along with pictures of others he's found. I would LOVE to have my mom's ring, but the setting is a little to high for my comfort. It's also yellow gold, which isn't my first choice.
After looking at the ring and talking with the BF, we decided that it's all up to him from now on - whether or not we use mom's ring, get the diamond re-set, or get a totally new ring. I hate suprises, but this is the one time in my life that I can handle it. Hopefully I'll have pictures to share within he next few months!
ooo that's such a cliffhanger!!
good luck, im sure it will be beautiful (he's got to know what you like by now, it sounds like you guys have really been discussing this!)
can't wait to see pics!
Ok. here's a quick update for anyone who cares.
- He's not using my mom's ring
- I'm pretty sure he has a ring already
- I'm super excited!
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My BF and I are (finally) going to look at rings this weekend. The best place to look is at the mall, which has Marks & Morgan, Zales, Kay, and other smaller chains. My question is this - Which store is the best place to look for rings that are 500$ or less? As a college student, it's not pratical for him to spend any more than that at this point in time, and I don't want to fall in love with a ring and then realize that its WAY out of his price range. Any advice?