Post # 1
I am a long time lurker and this would be my 1st post.
Awhile back, I went ring shopping with my SO. He purchased 0.8ct ring. A beautiful ring. He has not proposed yet but will by the end of the year. His friend plans to buy a ring too and he wants to purchase a 0.9ct and he wants to have my SO go with. When I heard that he wanted to purchase a larger carat, I felt sad and a little jealous.
In a way, my SO could have bought a much bigger ring with his budget but I opted to go with less cos I didn’t want him to spend too much. With that being said, when I heard that his friend wanted to buy a bigger ring to top it off, I felt jealous.
I felt my competitive side of me being unleashed and feel like I wanted a bigger one. Of course I was the one who opted to go smaller and i know that the reason behind the ring is what really means. I know all of that! It’s just for that few days, I felt a bit jealous and sad.
Have you ever felt that way?
Post # 2
It usually happens. Let them do what they want. Don’t think too much about smaller or bigger.
Post # 3
That size difference won’t be that noticeable.
Post # 4
Seriously? The difference between .8 and .9 is TINY. Look at 1mm on a ruler. Now imagine 25% of that, and that will be the difference between your stones. Pretty much indiscernible.
Post # 5
curioustoo : What age are you? People will always have bigger, better or more expensive things than you, you will need to learn to deal with it.
Post # 6
Which one is the .8 and which one is the .9? You’re whining over a difference so slight and negligible it’s astounding.
Post # 7
curioustoo : there’s a bee on here who always says that comparison is the thief of joy. That is 100% true in this case. The difference between these two stones is absolutely minimal. Do not get all bent out of shape. There will be tons of women who have bigger and better stones than you. Be happy with the ring that you’re FI chose for you especially because you initially told him not to spend too much.
Post # 8
first world problems over something so significantly small.. means you’re in for a very harsh reality check my dear.. very harsh. And that’s putting it nicely.
Post # 9
I think it’s a normal reaction but the difference is so minuscule as PPs have said. There are infinite possibilities for your right hand or multiple sets for your left if you’re open to that as well in the future. Adding stacking bands could also be a way to up the sparkle factor. Like they say; “comparison is the thief of joy”. I admire so many pieces of jewelry but instead of being jealous of the owners, I take notes for future projects if it catches my eye. Hang in there bee, it will pass
Post # 10
You won’t be able to tell the difference at all unless it’s like 0.8ct vs 1.2ct. Even 0.8ct and 1ct difference is minimal to a naked eye. Also the difference will be more relative to your finger size. Someone with a size 3.5 finger and a 0.7ct will probably look like they have a 1ct diamond whereas someone with a size 8 finger and a 1.5ct diamond will probably also look like they have a 1ct diamond too. The difference is more the finger coverage.
Don’t get jealous! Although I do notice others’ bigger rings but I am yet to experience it because none of my close friends are engaged or married. These kinda things happen all the time -especially if they are married to an older guy who’s more established or if they get married later than you then they are financially more secure because theyve had more years to establish their career and save up. It is all relative to your circumstances. Also it could mean that the other guy is more financially irresponsibile which you wouldn’t want!! Also, you can always upgrade later when you are older, financially secure and less responsibilities!
Post # 11
I would be jealous maybe a little but I agree with the other Bees that the difference is probably not noticeable. I’m surprised you know the exact size of this other ring. I didn’t think guys share this kind of stuff lol. Cost maybe but not size. I would let it go. Your diamond could cost more even though it’s slightly smaller bc it could be better quality. So many other factors besides size. I have learned the hard way.
Post # 12
I have a 1 carat, and I cannot tell the difference between that and anything between 0.75-1.1. It also depends on the size of the finger and the cut of the diamond. Well cut diamonds always look huge because that sparkle is unmistakable.
But really, a 0.8 is an incredible size. Many Bees have much smaller diamonds and are completely in love for all of the right reasons. Why does bigger mean better? When does ostentatious demonstrations of wealth win over genuine relationships? Every persons decision on their setting, stone and size is so unique to them.
Your boyfriend followed your instructions. That is fortunate and does not always happen. Celebrate him for being a great husband and focus on your exciting future!
Post # 13
Her fingers are way smaller than me, which is probably why I feel even more jealous. Bcos it would look so much larger on hers. I understand that it might not be much of a difference but the carat size does matter.
Doesn’t it for you?
Post # 14
curioustoo : No, it wouln’t matter to me. I’d be happy for her that she is getting engaged.
You say that your fingers are bigger than hers. Then you would need a larger carat size than her .9 to “look equivalent” to hers when on the hand, and to do such a thing would just be a crazy contest. Honestly, be happy that he followed your instructions, because it was you who told him what / how to buy. Maybe you’re just mad at yourself for that.
Post # 15
“I understand that it might not be much of a difference but the carat size does matter. Doesn’t it for you?”
I’ve never actually felt envy over another woman’s stone size and I have come in contact with many people who have both larger and smaller carats than I do. Remember why you and your FI chose the ring you did and be content with it; I mean you were at one point right?
I have never questioned the size of my carat. Since being engaged FI has at times (even recently) said he should have gone larger.. To which I laugh and say no, I am happy. It’s true, I am truly happy with what I’ve been gifted and wouldn’t want to change a thing.