Ring upgrade opinions please!

posted 3 years ago in Rings
  • poll: what should i do?
    keep the original diamond : (85 votes)
    67 %
    upgrade it : (42 votes)
    33 %
  • Post # 3
    2132 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Well, ultimately it’s up to you and your FI.  Don’t upgrade it because you think other people think it’s small.  I’m sure my .61 ct wouldn’t even warrant a second glance from those people- those are not the kind of people who you should let get to you (although I know it’s hard sometimes).  

    FWIW I think your original ring is gorgeous and a beautiful size on your finger.  But if this is something that you and your fiance want, then by all means for it.  But do it for the both of you- not anyone else.


    Post # 4
    457 posts
    Helper bee

    @bkm0826:  I actually really love your original diamond.  It’s lovely, and looks wonderful on your hand!!! 🙂

    Post # 5
    629 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I agree, you’re current diamond is a great size on your finger. Plus, I don’t see a huge difference between the two diamonds, I mean I can see a difference, but maybe not enough to warrant giving up the sentiment attached with the current stone.

    I can’t believe that some people are go quick to judge a ring size. First of all, 1 ct is nothing to look down at! Plus, depending on the quality, some can be upwards of 10k – in no way does that warrant being looked down upon.

    Sometimes I think society gets too caught up in being materialistic, I mean those snooty people putting you down have no right. I mean, how do they know that you didn’t elect to put more away for investing or paying down debt (which is what I would recommend doing with that $5,000). When we are all retirement age, what are they doing to wish they put emphasis on, a big diamond or saving away for the future?

    Post # 6
    3406 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    5k is a lot of money for such a small trade up. You do what you think is best, but 1 carat is a great size! Think about all the things you could do with 5k!

    Post # 7
    53 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    It looks like the diamond in your original ring is nicer quality. It could just be the pics. Do you know the specs of both stones? Don’t get me wrong, they are both gorgeous, it just looks like the smaller one sparkles more! It would make sense that the larger one reflects less light, since it’s cut shallow, which is why it faces up like a larger stone. 

    I think you should do whatever makes you happy. If you love the second ring, go for it! But do it for yourself, not because you received classless comments. There will always be someone with a bigger, more expensive ring. A carat is certainly not small, plus it looks like a great size on your finger! 

    Post # 8
    2782 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    @bkm0826:  It seems really silly to buy a siightly larger diamond for the sole purpose of people thinking it’s small?  I don’t hear YOU saying you just REALLY wanted a larger ring– I hear you being worried about what other people think.  And that just makes me sad for you.


    You original ring is beautiful- and honestly, unless you hold the 2 up next to eachother– I wouldn’t be surprised if those same people didn’t even notice the upgrade- which is what you seem to be concerned about.

    My suggestion would be to keep your original ring and put the 5k towards the college loans so you and your FI can move forward financially.

    Post # 9
    3016 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

    I am frankly baffled by this dilemma. Your ring is BIG. It’s gorgeous. I simply don’t see why you’d even want anything bigger.


    Post # 12
    584 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    SCREW THEM UPGRADE IT. My FI’s parents can be controlling so this also hit a nerve with me, but seriously, that is just sick. Totally upgrade. Don’t wear a ring where your whole life you’re going to be upset because someone got manipulative.

    But also, seriously…think about how you feel about the parents manipulating your FI that way. Maybe he SHOULD pay the loan just so that they could never hold it over him ever again if they don’t “approve” of a grown man’s choices, and you can upgrade later.

    (Also I’d consider going even a little bigger, just to see more contrast with the other one and so that you can ALWAYS feel proud. My diamond was an heirloom but I diamond shop for fun a lot, and personally I might just sacrifice clarity a little bit to go bigger. Because I’m classy like that.)

    Post # 13
    83 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    I don’t think size-wise the difference is worth the money but I am all for clarity. I would only upgrade if the clarity of your current stone is something that bothers you, though. I definitely would upgrade in that circumstance. Otherwise, use that money and go on an amazing trip-the memories will last as long as the new stone and you will still have the original!


    Post # 15
    6446 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2013

    What if they throw the loan back at him if he purchases this upgrade? Will he be able to afford to pay it off?

    I think $5k is a lot to spend for a ring where there seems to be very little difference. Your original ring is gorgeous and not ‘small’ at all. I personally would not upgrade.

    Post # 16
    3637 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    It sounds like it would make BOTH you and your FI feel better to upgrade it.

    I would certainly hate to look at my finger and just see his parent’s meddling in our lives. I would also hate for my SO to look at my finger and see something “lacking”, something he is not 100% happy with.

    Take him to look at the diamonds with you and see what he thinks. I think that by making this decision together you will either 1) Both choose a new ring that you love together or 2) Both choose your original ring, thus gaining ownership of it and liking it much more.

    Also, just thought I’d add that this is one of the best ever problems to have! It’s so fun that you get to go shopping for a new diamond, even if you don’t buy it in the end. 

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