Role for sisters ages 16-19

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: What should I call my 16-19 year old sisters in the wedding party?
    They're bridesmaids with less responsibility. Who cares about age, they're "junior bridesmaids". : (14 votes)
    25 %
    Just call them bridesmaids, even though they won't be doing the same things. : (28 votes)
    50 %
    Female ushers, or just ushers. Have them seat people. : (1 votes)
    2 %
    Greeting, directing, programs. Sounds like a "hostess". : (10 votes)
    18 %
    Something else: comment below. : (3 votes)
    5 %
  • Post # 3
    6928 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I’d call them junior bridesmaids and ask them to be involved in whatever capacity you think they’d be comfortable. Handing out programs, seating people, helping you “coordinate” on the day of…just whatever you feel they’d like best. Having them in similar or complementing dresses and on the program is the best way to make sure they don’t feel left out. I personally would rather be called a “junior bridesmaid” than a hostess or usher. It just sounds “prettier” and more important to me, but it’s just semantics.

    You could have them walk down the aisle, but then take a seat on the front row with family (where they’ll be anyway) instead of standing up there with you. Just have them be the last family members to walk and it’ll be obvious why. Does that make sense?

    Just some ideas/what I would do. My youngest sister is really little, so she actually ended up as my flower girl, but had we waited a few more years she would have been a “Junior Maid of Honor.” I only have one though!

    Post # 4
    42101 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    They could be a guestbook attendant, do a reading or be a gift table attendant. As the pp has suggested, they could walk down the aisle just before the wedding party and sit in the front rows reserved for family rather than stand at the front during the ceremony.

    Post # 5
    3280 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I wouldn’t have them as junior bridesmaids. I was a bridesmaid at 16, 18, and 19 and would have been offended if someone considered me a junior bridesmaid. Like PPs said, guest book attendants, hand out programs, readers, ushers, help with the decorations, etc.

    Post # 6
    5697 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I would just go with the Junior Bridesmaids, or, since they’re your sisters why not have them read a poem together? Ushers to me, aren’t really that special.

    Post # 7
    2546 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    just make them bridesmaids who won’t be doing the adult stuff

    Post # 8
    5160 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

    @corralynn:  I’m of the opion that the only really good non-bridal party jobs are 1) reader, and 2) officiant.  So in this case, reader is the only real possibility to me.

    I agree that “Junior” bridesmaid sounds pajoritive when applied to girls that old.  

    Have you asked your mom?  Since they live at home, she may have the best idea of how they’d like to be included?  For younger girls, sometimes the “trimmings” are what’s important.  Maybe they’d really like to be in a spcial dress that matches the bridal party so they are identified as important?  It could be as simple as that to make them feel special?

    Post # 9
    259 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    My sister is 14 and we’re 10 yrs apart. She’s my MOH while everyone is else is 25 and older who are in my party. My younger sister is 10 and she’ll be my flower gal even though I don’t want one. I did it for her.

    My opinion is have your sisters pass out programs. I would call them your dazzling dames.

    That’s what I’m calling my gals. I don’t like the term bridesmaids.

    Post # 10
    2893 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    i would just call them bridesmaids. i’ve never cared much for the term jr. bridesmaid. it just sounds silly to me. my maid of honor was my cousin and she was 17 at the time. my other bridesmaids were in their mid 20’s.


    Post # 11
    10748 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2014

    I get that you have your reasons for not making them bridesmaids originally, but they are your sisters. And late teens is perfectly old enough to be a bridesmaid. Obviously they’ll miss out on the wine tasting, but that doesn’t mean they can’t still be a bridesmaid.

    Post # 13
    1231 posts
    Bumble bee

    @corralynn:  I have seen honorary bridesmaids. If bridesmaids does not work for you, maybe that will. At that age I would have felt insulted to be called Jr.

    Post # 14
    1555 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Other than standing next to you during the ceremony, they don’t need to “do” anything. I would call them bridesmaids, I would be pretty insulted to be consider “junior” at 19. They can still be involved with your shower and things leading up to the wedding, and just don’t include them in the bachelorette party, I’m sure they will understand. 

    Post # 15
    1793 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I’ll be honest, and I’m not trying to be harsh at all, but I don’t see anything in your post as a reason they can’t be bridesmaids.  Passing out programs is a crap job and best left for smaller children.

    Your sisters are all way too old to be Jr BM’s.  It doesn’t matter if the sides are uneven.  Heck, if they are uneven, your older BM’s can process and recess back out with the GM’s and your sisters can walk individuall.  Problem solved there.

    Think big picture here.  In 20 years when you look at those pictures are you going to be glad there were even sides or will it mean more that they were part of the day.

    As for the bach party, lots of girls have underage BM’s.  You can do something earlier in the day that is age appropriate and alcohol free to include them and then go do your grown up thing.  This is all really easily solved here.

    Post # 16
    1327 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    I was 18 for my sisters wedding, a freshman at college 2 states away.  I was still her maid of honor (only sister).  It was understood by everyone that this was mostly in title, for the sentiment.  The other BMs did the shower and party planning. 

    At that age being called a junior would be a bit offensive, teenages can be very sensitive about that sort of thing.  I would just call them bridesmaids, but they just play a slightly different role.

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