- 4 years ago
First I want to say that I wouldnt blame some true LDR bees for laughing at me, but I am having a rough night missing my guy quite terribly.
My boyfriend is in the reserves and just graduated from college (both are 23). He is currently doing 2 wks of annual training a few states away and because I had a vacation the week before he left, it’ll really be 3 weeks of us being apart. Technically, we are always LDR because we live about 1h30min apart but we try to visit each other quite often so we usually see each other at least once a week if not more…
So really this is the longest we’ve been apart since we started dating, whcih will be 10 months this month. Things are good, and he has been great about calling me everyday and even texting when he can, but I cant help and feel so sad we can’t be together.. almost like i resent “normal couples”.. i know it sounds childish and selfish…
I guess the reason it hit me tonight is because he is leaving in November for military trianing and will be away for about 4 months.. and tonight seeing how terribly i miss him on week #2, how on earth will I handle 4 months!?
I’ve had thoughts that maybe this whole military life isnt for me.. but i love him so much and being in the military brings him great pridea nd makes him happy.. and I want him to be happy but sometimes I can’t help but resent him a little thinking, how can he be so okay with something that takes him so far away not just from me but his family and friends? I know im rambling and mostly its out of tonights crappy mood.
He has told me that although the type of military duty he is in isn’t active, he will still get deployed eventually, at least once in his lifetime and he wants to stay in the military for a long time from what he said, so to me taht means I either have to learn to handle these separations or it’s not going to work. He is very good at keeping his cool and is not very emotional so I’ve also had to learn that just because he isnt crying a river doesnt mean he doesnt feel sad, or miss me etc… I am fine when we are together but when I think of him leaving for so long, my mind always goes to the worst possible case scenario! (and that is with pretty mcuh life.. not juts my relationship.. but I am working on being more optimistic)
Bees, I am looking for advice on how to handle these separations. I can be naturally pessimistic by nature and even dwell on things.. but lately i have been trying to keep busy with anything, and if all fails nap! I have a full time job, so most of my day is taken up there, but once I come back home, it comes like waves, ill be watching a show and then suddenly feel blue..
Tonight he called and we talked for a few minutes, and when he had to get off the phone, I started crying! not bawling, but he could kinda tell by the crack of my voice even though I tried to hide it because i don’t want to be THAT girl.. I need to get it together…
Some advice and maybe LDR/military success stories would help! I guess i only see couples that live clsoe to each other that it seems almost impossible for LDR to work! When I tell people he is leaving for 4 months later this year people dont say it but give me look kinda like “oh.. yeah that sucks (not gonna work)” it would be nice to hear some positive stories for once!
THanks again and sorry if this post came off a bit negative, 🙁 I just needed to vent.
- This topic was modified 3 years, 9 months ago by willow_1960.