Post # 1
I am getting ready to order my invitations, and am having a little trouble deciding what I should put for the RSVP address and return address. My parents are hosting the wedding, and the invitation is worded to indicate that. They actually live pretty close to me, but I have been on my own for years. We did not ask them to pay for any of the wedding, although they are kindly helping out in a big way, and will probably end up paying for most of it. My mom says she "doesn’t mind" keeping track of the RSVPs. But I kind of want the fun of finding them in my mailbox – and I also don’t mind keeping track. Plus I really don’t want them to have the trouble of gifts delivered to their house rather than mine, and I’m a little afraid that if the only addresses people see are theirs, that’s what will happen.
What do you think? Is it odd to have them host but have the RSVPs come to me? Or is that pretty normal when I have my own house (which is where we will be living) and have been on my own for quite a few years?
Post # 3
My parents are technically hosting but the RSVPs are coming to our house and the return address will be ours. Our situation is a little different because we’re not even in the same state, but I think that would be fine to have the RSVPs come to you rather than them. Plus, if some of the people saw my parents’ name and address, they would be so confused as to who it was from, since they don’t KNOW my parents.
Post # 4
I am having them sent to my FH–my parents are hosting, but they live in Asia (and have somewhat unreliable mail delivery!), and I am moving to "our house" sooner than he is, but dont’ have an address for it (PO box).
Not ideal, maybe, but it was that or a friend’s place.
Post # 5
The wedding books say they go to the host, but if you’re doing the planning, it only makes sense that you get them. I am hosting my own, and I can’t wait to get my RSVPs back. I love getting mail!
Post # 6
my parents are hosting, but i’m doing the planning. however, my mom wanted her address listed on the return address and the rsvp to go to her house. i argued that it would have a texas postmark but "mailed from pennsylvania," but she was pretty adamant that her address was correct.
it was a small battle, and i let her win it. i was sad that i wouldn’t get to see who responded, but i told her that if she’s getting all the rsvps back, then she’s the one who has to fix all of the awkward situations (if someone responded for a guest and they don’t get one, if people don’t respond on time, etc.). no regrets on that one!
thinking about it now though, it is a little weird if the invite says "parents invite you to the marriage of their daughter" and for it go to the daughter. the parents are doing the inviting, not the daughter, so responses should go to the parents. but honestly, i really don’t think people not planning a wedding pay attention to that stuff.
Post # 7
I’d have them addressed to you to avoid gift address confusion. I can’t think of any other polite ways to indicate where people should send gifts to the happy couple and finding RSVPs in the mailbox and random gifts on your doorstep is part of the fun.
I agree with Rebecca that it is a little odd to have the responses go to someone other than the person who sent the invite but I can’t imagine anyone will get too worked up about it.
Post # 8
My parents are hosting, so their address is on the envelopes. For gifts, we are planning on meeting at my parent’s house after the honeymoon to open the gifts and write out the thank you cards– his family will join us at my parents for this event. I think it will be a lot of fun and a great way to celebrate with our parents as a married couple. This also avoids the issue of having gifts show up at our house when we are gone for two weeks for the honeymoon.
Post # 9
I think it’s totally fine to address the RSVPs to come directly to you. Like you said, most people will know you’ve been on your own for a while now.
Plus, is there anyone who really looks that closely to the invitation vs. the address on the RSVP envelope? They just check the box and stick it in the envelope provided.
Post # 10
My parents are also "hosting" the wedding, but I plan to use my address for the RSVP’s and return address. If having the RSVp’s come to your address will make it easier for you to track the guest list, thereby making it less stressful for you, by all means…..
Post # 11
I think you should just use your address for both. I was so excited to open my mailbox to be surprised to see who sent the RSVP!!!