(Closed) RSVP by phone?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: How should I word my RSVP?
    RSVP by phone is perfectly acceptable in this case : (26 votes)
    50 %
    Sorry but you have to have a RSVP card with a pre-stamped envelope. : (2 votes)
    4 %
    E-mail is a better option than phone. : (17 votes)
    33 %
    I have another idea! (See below) : (7 votes)
    13 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    5671 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I could see this being a huge headache as people are much more hesitant to call someone to RSVP, but you know your guests. In this case I guess it would be fine just to list your phone number to RSVP at the bottom of the invite. If you feel you would get a better response through email, I’m sure you could list that as well. I would model your invite a little more after a shower invitation with the RSVP wording on the bottom.

    Post # 4
    Member
    2889 posts
    Sugar bee

    i think it is fine and a great way to save paper/costs. We are doing an RSVP via our wedding website. I did not give people another option and hope that they will use the website. I know this is setting myself up for headaches but if it works, the RSVPs will be counted in an organized manner for me. I mostly did not want to deal with international postage and saw mailed RSVP cards to be an extra expense.

    Post # 5
    Member
    408 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    I’m doing a DW, so it didn’t make sense to me to buy response cards/envelopes/postage when 80% of the responses will be people declining. I asked guests to RSVP via phone or on our wedding website.

    Post # 6
    Member
    35 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    Like Miss BooBoo I’m having my guests respond to our wedding website or via phone (in case they don’t have internet access).  I don’t think you’ll have any problems.

    Post # 7
    Member
    306 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    The RSVP with the stamped envelope is just the most common iteration of RSVPing.  Technically, you’re just asking them to reply, so whatever form you think you’ll get the most/quickest/easiest responses should be the one you choose!

    Post # 8
    Member
    546 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I would do a combination of email and phone.  That way the people that are hesitant to call can still email you.

    Post # 9
    Member
    445 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2009

    I just had RSVP by phone or email (similar reasons to yours) and it worked out fine. A friend had everyone RSVP to her website, but that didn’t work out quite so well – some of the older generation were a little freaked out by that, I think. But they would not mind phoning.

    It sounds to me (from other RSVP threads) that so many people can’t be bothered to mail response cards back, so the waste is annoying. Definitely have an email option for the shy ones who hate phoning, though!

    Post # 10
    Member
    106 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    glad to see we are not the only ones…we are doing RSVP via our website and phone also, just in case people don’t want to use the internet.

    Post # 11
    Member
    3316 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    You might want to check out AnRSVP.com.  It is a free RSVP site, with a bunch of advantages:

    • The guest book is updated automatically which saves time.
    • The total number of guests who responded “yes” or “no” is provided right away without having to count manually.
    • You do not need to provide a return envelope with a stamp together with the wedding invitation.
    • There is no risk of mail being lost or that you forget to update the guest list.
    • Optionally, you can also be asking your guests about their menu choices. Then, you will know how many guests want chicken, how many want fish etc. without counting them manually.

    Post # 12
    Member
    1686 posts
    Bumble bee

    R.s.v.p. cards were introduced only within the last 50 years or so, and only became common within the last twenty or so. Even today, among folk who routinely hold other formal events and not just weddings, guests know enough to write their “Miss Aspasia Phipps/accepts with pleasure the kind invitation of ….” type of response on their own stationery (and find the printed R.s.v.p. form just a little tawdry.) And even fifty years ago, before R.s.v.p. cards came into vogue, Amy Vanderbilt and Letitia Baldridge were suggesting that “modern” hostesses could use a phone number for R.s.v.p.s without embarrassment.

    Personally, I think you should put your phone number, AND your email address under the R.s.v.p. line. It’s a rule of good taste that “form follows function”. The function of an R.s.v.p. is to let you know who’s coming, and giving our guests the choice of communicating that back to you by mail (on their own stationery) or by phone or by email which ever is easiest for them, serves that function best.

    Post # 13
    Member
    573 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    Postcards are more environmentally friendly and they cost less than a card with an envelope.

    Post # 15
    Member
    14750 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    You can make them yourself.  You can get some really cute designs from weddingchics.com or i-do-it-yourself.com if you are willing to DIY.

    Post # 16
    Member
    30 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    We did RSVP’s by phone (b/c most everyone has one) and via our website.  It give’s people an option and they are both easy to track.  We got a google voice number and linked both to a gmail account.  Do what works for you.  Good luck.

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