Post # 1
Ok ladies, so I need some advice. When it comes to RSVP should I have my guests RSVP to me or my mother? At first I thought, well my mom is a stay at home mom who doesn’t work so this can help her feel like she’s busy and organizing something at all times for the wedding. Then I thought, this is OUR WEDDING, they should be RSVP-ing to us. Is this tacky to have it sent to my mom? What is proper ettiquete?
Post # 3
Etiquette “says” that RSVPs go to the person(s) hosting the wedding, but obviously you can do it however you’d like. 🙂
Post # 4
Who is going to keep track of all of it?
Post # 5
I thought this would be a “busy” task for her to keep track of. They are helping a lot with the wedding, but is it tacky to have your mother as the person to RSVP to?
Post # 6
- Wedding: November 2012 - Oak Tree Manor
@Steph93675: Has your mom offered to help with the RSVPs? Are you super busy yourself? I don’t think it’s a big deal who the RSVPs go to (I honestly never notice, I just write my DH and I’s names on the line and drop them in the mailbox when we’re invited to weddings!). BIG BIG tip if you’re about to send out your invitations – use a pencil to write a very faint number on the back of each RSVP card, and match the number to each guest/family/couple. Some people forget to write their names on their RSVP cards, and it’s a nightmare trying to figure out who mailed which card! That saved us on multiple RSVPs. Also helps when the guest has bad handwriting 🙂
Post # 7
@Gemstone: +1 that’s accurate. We are hosting, so our RSVP’s were sent to us. But if my parents were hosting, they would be sent to them.
Post # 8
We put my Mom in charge of it, but we also have an online RSVP option & I’ve ended up being the one in charge of checking of the list. She updates me if someone calls her. I have also designated check up calls to each of us depending on who they are. My Mom contacts our family, his Mom contacts hers & we each call our friends. I think you should do whatever feels easiest for you.
Post # 9
“BUSY TASK” sounds mean! My mom is very involved in our planning and always wants to help or be doing something wedding related. Thanks for the numbering advice on the RSVP, I think I read this as well on pinterest. I have created an alphabetical spread sheet of guests, number invited, yes or no, and number attending to be used as RSVP’s are returned.
Post # 10
[comment moderated for trolling]
Post # 11
etiquete dictates that responses should go to the host.
however, you can do what you want.
on the back flap of the envelope, i am putting my mother’s address. but i would like to receive and keep track of guests so i am having the responses sent to me. plus, i live about 30 minutes from my mom and dont see her every week. so i wouldn’t want to wait to see them, ours are not standard issue.
Post # 12
who is host on invitation? that’s who they should go to.
Post # 13
They go to whomever the hostess, your mother, wishes to receive them. Etiquette allows her to have replies directed to her social secretary if she has one, so she may certainly have them directed to her daughter if that is what she wants.
We actually just sent out our invitations today. My parents are hosting and sent out the inviations butthe rsvps are addressed to me because it is our wedding and I am really excited to check the mail for the rsvps!!
Post # 14
I never really understood the whole “host” thing. We are planning the wedding. We created and sent out the invitations, and we are receiving and keeping track of the RSVPs. I don’t think I could handle not knowing who’s RSVPing.
Post # 15
I have the RSVPs going to my mom’s address, but our names are listed instead of hers.
FI and My Names
123 Moms Address
City, State 34985
The reason I did this was just because I wanted everything sent to one address, and since she is also stay-at-home I thought it made more sense to have any potential gifts sent there since she’d be home to receive them whereas they’d be sitting on my doorstep all day.
Post # 16
@Gemstone: Really….dang. I guess Ill change it go get mailed to my parents then. :/ They will have to email and call me daily so I know whos coming and whos not!!