Post # 1
So long story short, my Fiance and I had already made plans today(ones we couldnt cancel), when we were invited to his childhood friends wedding. So we RSVP’d no. Now this morning comes around, and our plans fell through. He now wants to go to the wedding. I say it is rude to show up after saying we weren’t coming, but he still wants to go. This is causing a huge arguement. The couple is really laid back, but the reception is at a country club, so I’m not sure what kind of wedding it’s going to be(the invites were really nice letterpress). Please vote on what we should do, thanks!
~I also need to add, the invite was addressed only to him, BUT I think they just dont know better and arent very formal…which makes me more confused on what to do
Post # 3
@ithinkpink90: if it’s his friend, he would know best… but i think he should at least talk to his friend first.
Post # 4
I would absolutely not just show up. I’d say if it was a really casual, backyard wedding you could ask the couple if it’d be ok to come but otherwise no way!
Post # 5
@ithinkpink90: Could you show up later in the evening, after dinner for drinks? You could just skip the dinner part. That way you can see them still, but not mess up their food/seating arrangement.
Post # 6
You RSVPed no that means you don’t show up.
They don’t need the hassle of figuring out where to fit you two on the day of their wedding. Don’t go. Send a gift if you really had wanted to go but could not because of the more important original plan.
Post # 7
- Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast
If you went, there woiuld not be a table for you to sit at, food for you to eat, etc. AND you would be placing the bride and groom in an awkward situation. Absolutely do not go.
Post # 8
I would stay home because that is two plates that they would have paid for. If you do decide to go, go to the ceremony, get something to eat in between and then go to the reception after dinner. That way there is no awkward “oh, i have to feed you now,” moments.
Personally, I would just stay home, though.
Post # 9
Nope, don’t go. And don’t call them asking either – this is a stressful day with tons going on, the last thing they should be doing is trying to figure out how to fit more people in. This is a bummer though, I definitely feel for you!
Post # 10
…on another note I may be offended if someone said they could not come, then they did it would make me feel like coming to my wedding was second choice…but it would all depend on the couple too, you know them best!
Post # 12
Thank You! you just confirmed everything I was thinking. He’s saying I’m over thinking it and just being a birdezilla….ugh men!
And we did send a gift, a few weeks ago, after we mailed RSVP
Post # 13
Weddings are not the kind of thing you can change your mind on the day of…to even ask them if you can come when you already said you weren’t coming is kind of rude, IMO.
It’s too bad that your plans fell through but that’s life. No one wants to deal with unexpected guests on the day of.
Post # 14
I dont know his friends. I would be a little irritated after organizing everything and making a seating chart etc. If he wants to go then he should talk to his friends and see if it is possible, but I would NOT just show up unannounced without letting the bride and groom know. No matter how laid back they are that is rude!
Post # 15
you are absolutely right–and he is absolutely wrong! It’s a bummer but you should definitely not go.
Post # 16
If he is close to his friend, I would go after dinner.