(Closed) rsvp's

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
817 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013 - Mansion House at the MD Zoo

We sent Save-The-Date Cards about 6 months out. We sent invitations about 10 weeks early, RSVP date was 4 weeks before. We sent them a bit early because we didn’t want them to get caught up in the holiday card madness though. We started getting some responses back imediately, a bunch in the two weeks after we sent them, and then a few trickled in every day. We invited 180 and had 120 RSVP yes. We had to track down ~15 invitations (probably 25 people total) after our RSVP date. I gave 3 days after the RSVP date and started emailing/Facebooking/calling. We still have two people who have not responded. 🙂 Neither showed up though, which was my worst nightmare. The most frustrating was FI’s uncle and his wife and 4 kids who, when his mom called them two weeks before, were like, oh, we haven’t decided. Um, excuse me, you had known for 6 months, saw us two months before and mentioned you were looking forward to it, and uncle is a fancy pants executive for a cable company… how do you not know how RSVP works? Between that and MIL’s friend who she didn’t even know if she had a working phone number or address for her…. How are you inviting her to our wedding (which you are not paying for) if you don’t talk to her enough to know her phone number. Argh. Prepare to be frustrated.

We had 1/3 decline but our wedding was during the school year and we did not invite kids (although provided babysitting) so I think that contributed to it. We had a lot of out-of-town people come that we didn’t expect, and some who had initially indicated (when we sent STDs) that they were coming ended up RSVPing no. We had 2 no-shows, apparently the husband had a stomach flu that morning and texted MIl to let her know. And one couple had a sick kid so the dad brought his sister and the wife stayed home since they couldn’t have a babysitter with sick kid. I don’t have a problem with  that–we had paid for her meal etc so at least someone used it and Fiance has met her a few times.

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