(Closed) RSVPs: What to do about the stragglers?

posted 8 years ago in Logistics
  • poll: How much should you hound the guests who still haven't RSVPed?
    Just let it go---if they were coming, you'd have heard from them by now. : (1 votes)
    4 %
    Give up on the OOT guests, but email or call the local guests until you get an answer. : (5 votes)
    22 %
    Call or email everyone until you get an answer. : (17 votes)
    74 %
  • Post # 3
    605 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2010 - Ritz-Carlton, Half Moon Bay

    that’s annoying when people don’t answer. that was a good strategy to send out the reminder email to get most of the rest of the responses. while you could probably safely assume that the 9 outstanding are a “no”, it’s a small enough number that you could get a direct answer from them on the phone (or a personal email instead of a group one) that will be worth you not have to worry about “oh my gosh but what if they come”. but that’s really not bad–there are always going to be a few people who don’t respond, so 9 is definitely okay!

    Post # 4
    1080 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2010

    phone them or have your mom or Mother-In-Law call to get an answer

    Post # 5
    2476 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    Just me, but it would drive me nuts to not get every guest’s response.  My situation is a bit different though… we’re having a plated dinner and we pay by the head.  I had to know if each person was a YES or NO… it was annoying tracking down the stragglers, ugh!  Undecided

    Post # 7
    58 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I would say give the five remaining couples a call. They might of looked over the email, I know I do that alot myself. If the couples do not give you a clear answer, I would not pay extra for those people to come. Even if you are not having a plated dinner or a formal seating, if you have a caterer they might charge you extra after the event and you don’t want that. You also shouldn’t have to have that extra stress when it is not needed.  

    For our wedding, my Fiance and I told our wedding planner that alot of our family are like this. They will not RSVP but they want to show up. I told her that if they are not on our guest list then they do not come in. I know it is harsh but if you take the time and energy to send out invites – online or via mail – then those guests should at least give you a yes or no.

    Good Luck!  

    Post # 8
    655 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2011

    If i didn’t hear back after the first call, I sent an email or called back and said something like “Hi! I haven’t gotten your RSVP yet, so I will mark you down as a no unless I hear back differently by Friday. Thanks!”

    And there were 4 people we never heard from at all. Soooo rude. At least most people responded and let us know why they weren’t coming.

    Post # 9
    900 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I promise I’ll never do it again, but I have been a straggler my entire life.  I’m not sure if I have ever RSVPd on time and nearly every single time, I was planning on attending.  I don’t think you realize how important it is until you participate in the wedding process yourself (either through someone else, or yourself). 

    I would have responded to your initial email, but I would give them at least one call.  I like Vonnegurl’s idea to say “if I don’t hear from you by..”

    Ah…confessed…feels better. (I bet karma’s gonna cause all of my RSVPs to be late!)

    Post # 11
    29 posts
    • Wedding: June 2010

    im in the same boat. my deadline was yesterday and im still waiting on 27 rsvp cards!

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