(Closed) Rude Seating Chart Freakout! (Long)

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
1235 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

This girl is obviously super self centered and if it was me I would say screw her and say it’s just better if you didn’t come. You know on your wedding all shell be dwelling on is her seating situation and I personally wouldn’t want that negativity at my party.

Post # 4
1734 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Keep your seating chart as it was when you told your friend, pre-emptively thank S for handling any issues that might pop up on that day during dinner, and don’t pursue it any further with Crazy Friend. It’s clear that you let her know as a heads-up, NOT as a chance to approve or disapprove your choice. Her reaction is bizarrely disproportionate, and completely inappropriate in any case. If Crazy Friend tries to reopen the issue with you before the wedding, simply shut her down — “We haven’t made a final decision, so you’ll have to see on the day” or “This topic isn’t up for discussion.”

Post # 5
701 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2004

OMG.. that is a total spoilt brat at work. I can understand you telling her that she would be seated without the other friends, so it wouldnt be a total shock or anything at the reception. These things happen. She has to grow up.

I dont think you should feel bad about where she is seated.

However you did mention that you work with her? it may be best that you try and smooth things over with her. Only for your sake.. a wedding is for one day you could work with her for a while…

eta. in smoothing this out i dont mean re-arranging the seating plan for her.. Just say Im sorry that you feel as if i’ve put this on your shoulders, that wasnt my intention. I was just letting you know that you will be sitting with other people and that way it wouldnt come as a shock to the system on the day. I thought you would appreciate this as sometimes it can be awkward sitting with people you dont know, and thought i was doing you a favour telling you in advance. But dont say sorry for where you are sitting her. or anything else.. IMO

Post # 6
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

i wouldnt even bother trying to negotiate with her – she is a guest and she has no say in where people are seated and needs to learn to STFU and smile

i would also keep work and private life/wedding conversation seperate. sorry this seems to have blown up in your face – she was the one being rude and its now awkward for all involved

Post # 7
4804 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Wow I can’t even believe this is real.  I would definitely not be changing her seat; your arrangement is perfectly reasonable and it’s not like she’s glued to the seat all night.  She’s lucky she didn’t get a big fat eff off from you in my opinion. 

Post # 8
7779 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Wow, your “friend”…. is a bitch. Stick her where she is and make her deal with it. Maybe if she had approached it another way, a calm and sane way, I would have said to try and accomodate her but nope, not now. She made her bed at this point. You were much nicer than I would have been. I would have told her to deal with it and if she had that big of a problem, she could switch her RSVP to the “regret” side.

This really isn’t what you should worry about 10 days before the wedding. You have so many other things to do, I’m sure. I did seating for 65 people and it was hard enough, I can’t imagine how long it took for 300 people! Your table chart is done. Leave it finished and move on to your other last minute projects, which I’m sure there are plenty of. This girl is obviously not worth the aggravation at this point. Hope everything works out for you and congrats on getting married in 10 days!

Post # 9
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Bent Creek Winery (Livermore, California); Reception: Family Residence (San Ramon, California)

OMG, this is kind of unbelievable. If it were me, I wouldn’t have even entertained her complaints at. I mean, it’s your seating chart, and if you were to take everyone’s requests into consideration, you’d be rearranging for hours! A simple, “I’m sorry you feel that way, but this is the seating arrangement” should have kept her quiet. In the future, I just wouldn’t tell her anything about your seating arragments. Or probably wedding plans, for that matter. She needs to chill out. 

Post # 10
2578 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

She is not your friend. She is your giant pain in the ass.

Post # 11
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

What a freaking diva…and that is putting it very nicely!  Do not change the seating chart, and do not discuss it with her or anyone else because that lengthy conversation was ridiculous, you don’t have to explain yourself or justify your reasoning to her, she clearly just wants to be unreasonable and difficult.

Post # 12
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

She’s a moron, but this a great reminder that guests and family should be on a strict “need to know” basis. There would have been less harm in having her simply show up at the wedding and having no choice but to deal with it. This wasn’t something that she needed to know in advance, so I kinda agree with her there. But her reaction is just so over the top.  She’s acting like a damn child.

Post # 13
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

How absolutely dare she!?! Don’t entertain any more of her utterly selfish behaviour. You’re not putting her in any ‘difficult position’…she’s done that herself. What a *******.

Honestly, go into work and say nothing. If she asks, say that you just can’t accomodate everyone’s first choices, you’ve done your best and you’re sorry that you have disappointed her. If necessary, make the point that not one other person has reacted to where they are seated in the way she has done.

Why do people have such a huge sense of entitlement when it comes to other people’s weddings!!??!!

So sorry you’re having to deal with this.

Post # 14
5221 posts
Bee Keeper

You definitely do not need friends like this… not in wedding planning and not in life. These are the typical high maintenance, easily offended, what-can-YOU- do-for- ME type of people, and they suck the life out of you. Run, don’t walk, away from people like this… invest your time and energy in friendships that are fruitful, uplifting and mature.

Post # 15
1144 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Wow she’s being a total Bi**h. Leave it the way it is. Jeeze I still am in a little shock at how rude this girl is.

Post # 16
359 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

wow….dont even bother with this girl, seriously!!! Its your wedding! I am not showing my seating charts to anyone- ppl can see it when they get to the wedding- Its REAAAALLLY hard to do the seating chart and I really think that, if ppl had a say about it, it would be a grand mess- some ppl just care about themself!

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