Post # 1
Is it rude to buy cloth diapers for someone if they didn’t ask for them but I feel it’s what they should be using? My BIL’s girlfriend is having a baby soon. She doesn’t have a job and he has temporary employment here and there. Needless to say there isn’t much money and the government will be supporting if not already. I think they should try and save money by using cloth diapers. But also, DH and I have money and I fully plan on using them for the environment factor so I also support them that way. Just wondering if it’s not my/our place to push that.
Post # 3
Definitely not your place to push cloth diapering onto them. It may be better for the environment, but it’s still not for everyone. What I think you should do is have a casual chat with your BIL’s girlfriend, mention cloth diapers and gauge her reaction. If it’s positive/interested/curious, buy her a set as a gift. If she’s not interested at all, don’t bother.
*I think it’s wonderful that you plan on cloth diapering, I think it’s such a great option. I will cloth diaper when I have kids IF I have my own washer & dryer. I just couldn’t do it if I was using laundry facilities/laundromats.
Post # 4
When my brother was born, my mother cloth diapered. I did a lot of them. Ugh, good or the environment, not for me. Of course we didn’t have a washer/dryer. Oh, when I think of those days….
Post # 5
yeah i think she’ll think it’s weird if the two of you have never talked about it before… feel her out about it first.
Post # 6
@Talishazwi: Not your place to decide that for them. Maybe if you talk to them about it and see how they feel then maybe.
Post # 7
I would talk to her about them. Maybe show her what some of the new styles are like and how easy it is to use them. Many people don’t realize how easy it can be to cloth diaper and that you aren’t stuck using prefolds with pins and rubber covers. I’d definitely offer to buy her some if she’s interested, but I wouldn’t try to force it on her.
Post # 8
I agree with the previous posters. Whether its good for the environment or not, its her baby and her decision. If you havent talked to her about it and you just buy her cloth diapers she may never use it and that will just be a waste
Post # 9
Not your place at all. To me that would be like buying someone a breast pump because they don’t have money and formula is too expensive. It’s a personal choice for them to make as parents.
Personally I did cloth diapers for a few months and hated it. I ended up buying the biodegradeable disposables instead.
Post # 10
I would talk to her first… if you buy them she might not use them and then it’s just a waste. That really thoughtful of you though diapers are expensive.
Post # 11
I think you definitely need to discuss it with the mom-to-be before you run out and buy them for her. This is one of those individual parenting decisions that the parents need to make, and not have forced on them. It is nice of you to want to help out though.
Post # 12
Ok thanks ladies. I know she needs diapers so I went to go price them out and the prices are an eye opener! That’s why I thought the cloth kind but you all are right. I think I will ask her about it though and see what she thinks.
Post # 13
I want to use cloth diapers and I’d be very offended if someone who knew that went out and bought me disposable b/c it’s what they thought they wanted. It’s their decision how they want to diaper their baby.
Post # 14
Is it rude to buy cloth diapers for someone if they didn’t ask for them but I feel it’s what they should be using? YES. You can’t tell them what they “should” be doing. You know what’s best for your family, not theirs. Heck, I was offended you added in they may be on government assitance and they need to save money. EVERYONE needs to save money.
I plan to use cloth and I plan to get the word out through my mom. I plan to use them because I want to save money and throwing money away on disposable isn’t on my agenda. Not too concerned about the environment.
Post # 15
I think buying them would 1) yes, be rude, even with the best intentions, and 2) good chance you’d be wasting your money, because cloth diapering is a lifestyle, and if she’s not willing to live it, she won’t use them.
I don’t, however, think it would be rude of you to OFFER to buy them. Talk to her about cloth diapering, tell her why you think it’s great (environment, long term savings, etc. – there’s a thread on the baby board I think even a sticky all about it if you need info) and then if you sense she’s interested, finish with something like, “I know they can be something of an investment to purchase right off the bat, especially since you have to buy so many at once, and I thought if you guys were interested in trying cloth diapering, I’d like to buy you some diapers as a gift.”
Let her make the decision though. 🙂
Post # 16
I agree in letting her make the decision. Cloth diapering isn’t for everyone, and I don’t think forcing it on her is going to make it any more appealing. Definitely talk to her about it first before you buy them and she ends up not using them.