Post # 1
- Wedding: September 2010 - MacLean Park
So, my husband is an electrical technician, and his job sends him on the road a lot to do testing and maintenance on power plants. He’s trying to get switched to a plant job (which is local) over a road job (which can take him all over Texas and surrounding states for up to 2 weeks at a time), but for now, he’s still out of town as much as he is home. We just got word that he has to leave on the 3rd for two weeks, and will be missing my 25th birthday, and our first real prenatal, when we’d get to hear the heartbeat. It totally sucks, he really wanted to be there. I was planning on having a good girlfriend go with me, but my appointment is on the first day she goes back to nursing school for the semester. I’m hesitant to go alone, just because I don’t want to get there and have them not hear a heartbeat and have to deal with that by myself. I’ll be at 9 1/2 weeks, which is far enough along. So, I wanted to know, did any of you go to your prenatals alone? Did your husbands tag along? Or a mom/friend/family member?
Post # 3
I think if you can change the appointment you should. This seems like something your husband really wants to be a part of (and should). If for some reason you just can’t make it work I think you should find someone else to go with you.
Post # 4
Maybe go alone, b/c you don’t really want to push back your first real prenatal appt. I voted other b/c maybe you can get a recording of the baby’s heartbeat at the Dr’s office and send it to your husband. Or have him on the phone so that he can hear it, even if he can’t be there physically? Talk it over with your Dr and see what your options are.
Post # 5
From reading other people’s posts on this board, there are more men that don’t go to the appointments than do. A lot of the time, as you are finding out, it’s impossible (or really super duper hard) for them to take the time off that is needed to be at all those appointments.
That being said, take your mom or a friend if you don’t want to go alone. Although I’m pretty sure that some of those you will be going by yourself.
As for your birthday, I’m so sorry he’s missing it! I hope he’ll plan something great for your when he gets back 🙂
Post # 6
I would reschedule so that he could be there, personally.
Post # 7
When I was pregnant with my kids, I did everything alone. The kid’s father was in the military and gone all the time. It really wasn’t so bad. In your situation though, if it really means that much to your husband, I would reschedule the appointment, for when he gets back. If he won’t be too disappointed with you going alone, I would do that.
Post # 8
I think you should do what is the best for you. While it may be “normal” for the guy to not be there, I know I would not be comfortable with that. So, if you are ok going alone or bringing someone else, do that. If not, i’d definitely change the appointment! 🙂
Post # 9
I would definitely reschedule so he could be there. I’m not even having my first ultrasound until 11-12 weeks, so you aren’t going to be behind on things or anything.
Post # 10
If it were me I would reschedule so that he could be there.
Post # 11
I think I would reschedule if I were in your position.
Post # 12
I would reschedule since it is obviously important to you.
Post # 13
I went alone but would have loved to have had company.
Post # 14
I’m with the PPs on saying reschedule (earlier) if you could. I wouldn’t push it back, though. And if it doesn’t work out for him to join you, see if your tech is cool with having your computer with you so DH can Skype in and still ‘be there’ with you to see it, talk to you, and share the excitement.
Post # 15
- Wedding: September 2010 - MacLean Park
@indibee: That’s a great idea, I totally wish it would be possible 🙁 He’s in an electrical power plant, so they can’t even have cell phones with them. Blah. I’m hoping that, if I can’t reschedule, he can perhaps request a break so maybe I can get him on conference call. He’s so excited about the baby he can hardly stand it, so I’d love to get him involved where he can.
I’m going to call the doctor in early January, once he gets a better idea of his schedule, and see if I can move it back a week. I’m nervous about it, becuase I really want to make sure everything is going to be ok. But I miscounted before, on the 10th I’ll be 8 1/2 weeks, not 9 1/2. So I think pushing it back wouldn’t hurt much. I don’t expect him to be able to make every appointment, but this first one is so critical that it would be really nice to have him there.
Post # 16
Aww Mrs. Sand Dollar that really stinks!
I had to move one of our u/s appointments (8w so hopefully will hear the h/b for the first time) because DH wasn’t able to attend. Luckily I only had to move it 1 day but it was important to me that he be able to join in. I think its hard for guys to get attached to the baby but by hearing the heartbeat hopefully they can.
If you are going the conference call route, you may want to call and make sure the u/s machine actually creates an audible h/b sound. I guess sometimes early on its just a visable flicker.