(Closed) Sad MOB

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
5988 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

I don’t think you can blame yourself for what’s going on.  Seems like your mom is going through some stuff.  It seems like the best thing you can do is try to be supportive and try to continue communicating.  Sounds like she needs lots of love and support right now.

Post # 4
Member
2470 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Awww, I think your mom is just dealing with her own wedding stress. My mom does this too. When I first moved away for grad school (an hour away … keep in mind i went to undergrad 2 hours away) she wouldn’t speak to me the ENTIRE move up.

Now I am wedding planning from a distance and she has all these ideas and usually brings them up when I’m tired, distracted or just not in wedding "mode". Even last night she says "well this is going to be the biggest day of my life" and I say "Ummm.. I’m pretty sure it’s going to be the biggest day of MY life"!

She probably just needs a little time to cool down. Leave it be. She will move past it and eventually listen. Hopefully!

Post # 5
Member
365 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Like my future MIL told me – your mom will probably be a ball of mixed emotions excited you are getting married and upset b/c her daughter is growing up and moving on. 

My mom was very upset I choose Myrtle Beach b/c I have no family in the area and that I choose it so my FI grandparents who are 80+ could attend.  Her exact words were "So we have to travel b/c of 2 people."  Six months later she is excited and ok with the idea of traveling. 

My advice is don’t tell her everything that is involved with the wedding planning.  Share the good stuff and wait for your excitement to die down some so that you are not so disappointed if she doesn’t seem as excited as you. 

Congrats and I wish you the best with your mom.  She’ll eventually come around just give her time to do so.

Post # 6
Member
458 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I agree with jaydee – she is probably a mixed ball of emotions because of the excitement, but knowing that her little girl is growing up.  I know my mom sometimes took things very personally when I had a little tiff with my FMIL or FSIL, so I stopped telling her about most of those things because I didn’t want to stress her out, and I didn’t want her to hold those things against them in the future.  Maybe talk with her more about happy news, and make sure to enforce with her that you are so excited about your day and would love her input (even if you don’t).

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