Sad wife…

posted 3 years ago in Military
Post # 3
Member
2630 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Hope555:  ((Hugs)) I’m sorry you’re so unhappy. It sounds like your DH isn’t very good at dealing with negative feelings, and right now there’s a lot going on. He might feel very guilty about fighting before having to leave and not being there to set up the house with you, but it’s coming out as irritation and anger. He’s uncomfortable talking about his feelings, so they come out in other ways. He loves you. Visit him with an open, compassionate heart, and when you both have time, you can talk about better communication. 

Post # 4
Member
313 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

do you think, he thinks you have trust issues? i wouldn’t say to have a heavy conversation over the phone. but definitely talk it out when he comes back, and tell him, while not his intent, he makes you feel the way that you do. if he’s not good at picking up on things, you have to literally spell it out. in the end you can be okay with yourself and that you held your end.

Post # 7
Member
313 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

@Hope555:  i was reading your post intently hahah.  you are very decriptive. i don’t think you were wrong in any way. if presented with the same situation, i would have responded the same way, although you do sound a bit more composed than i would have been. i like how you put this:But I am known to protect what is mine and I need to be respected. the way that i see it, it is a matter of respect and it is odd that his friend was a bit loose with his words in front of you. my take on this is that he probably does think you have trust issues and even when you are not, he probably thinks you want to be in the know of his many moves. this is especially hard with the distance. in my opinion time will fix this and you have to show him in actions what you feel and i’m referencing your friends porition of this, of how he hasn’t made any work friends. allow him to have his guy time i guess (not saying that you are not). but in a way, displace yourself and say, ok i”ll be with so and so today, so why don’t you have some guys over and fire the grill up. i wish you luck!

 

 

Post # 9
Member
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Oh dear! Do you think it is the distance starting to take its toll on him? 

Post # 10
Member
1044 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

We have had to spend lots of time apart and it can be do hard, but the hardest separations are when he’s at school or training or something in the states for months  at a time. Of course deployment sucks but there’s nothing we can do about it.

during training my hubby would find things to keep him busy, which also made time to chat difficult, we started arguing and getting frustrated so.. I bought a plane ticket and stayed with him for 9 days. It was boring while he was gone during the day, but so worth being with him.

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