- 5 years ago
- Wedding: March 2013
I normally don’t post anything dramatic, I’m usually just here to get some assistance with weddings bands, flowers, etc. However, I am in a bit of a dilemma. My best friend of 13 years was excited when I got engaged and all she talked about was how she couldn’t wait to stand up there with me (as my MoH) and blah blah blah.
This is going to be a long, long rant and I am very appreciative of anyone who takes the time to read this.
When I first chose my BMs dresses in May, BF(best friend) was my guinea pig. We finally found a dress that would be best for my BMs who are heavier and my mom (Matron of Honor) who is very thin. We were all ecstatic because it happened to be the dress that I loved on the hanger. I gave my bridesmaids a deadline to purchase the dress and told them all that if they were having financially difficulty I would be more than happy to assist. Fast forward to December and BF still does not have her dress. At this point, I am irritated and hurt that its taken her so long to get her dress ($150). I was given the run around for MONTHS. When she finally did go buy her dress the only remaining sizes was a 24 and a 26; she needed a 26. So, it worked out okay but what would have happened if she needed a smaller size?? A part of me is still really upset that she waited so long, especially after putting down a few of my other BMs that had to make a 8 hour round trip drive to get the dress and did so within the first 3 weeks I chose it.
My wedding is in basically 2 months and she has not made travel arrangements. I am moving back home before my wedding and that’s where it is taking place. My BF has known that my FI and I were looking to move back home and that our wedding has NEVER ever been in our current city. This last weekend, my mom and her were over and we were doing some wedding stuff. We ran to a store to get additional materials and she tells me that’s she done trying to plan my bachelorette party..(Wow, okay, thanks so much for the effort and dropping it on someone else the last minute) and that it’s MY fault if she can’t make it to my wedding. And that she expected to drive with me (yet she knows I was moving, and has known for certain since June). She’s known for almost a YEAR that she would have to save money for travel arrangements (only a flight and a hotel the night of my wedding). But suddenly, it’s my fault.
I should mention that she has a SEVERE gambeling addiction. This has caused problems throughout my whole wedding because in June I loaned her the money to get her dress and she DIDNT. Another thing, regarding the bachelorette party, SHE wanted to host it, although my other BMs all said they would be happy to take care of it since it will be back home and they live there. She has spent a total of $150 on napkins, plates, etc and was texting my other BMs and telling them how broke she was and demanding that they help but never specified what she needed help with.
Long story short, she may or may not make it to my wedding. Doesn’t think it’s “fair” that she has to spend $150 on a plane ticket and then spend 4 hours in the car to get to my house (from a small, small town). But yet, I have to make a 8 hour long drive car ride to pick her up and then drive back and shes the one who is suffering… are you kidding me? So, essentially if she doesn’t make it it’s my fault. There have been numerous other things that she has said that have hurt my feelings. We’ve been best friends since we were kids yet she acts like my wedding is putting her out. I’ve tried to be patient and sympathetic; I’ve even tried helping financially but I feel like I keep getting slapped in the face. At this point, I either have to accept that she can’t stand on her own two feet (she still lives with her mom and it’s financially responsible because of her addiction) and pay for her flight and hotel room for one night or… continue to be pist that she’s been such a rip roaring bitch to me and take the risk of her not being a part of my wedding.
I don’t know what to do.. help! (Thanks for reading all of this; I know it’s a full novel, lol)